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Tumblr: a magical website with the bizarre, the hilarious and the unexpected. Think you've seen it all? Think again. The best one-liners, random threads and weird thoughts are yet to be discovered.

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thespacemaid if anyone would like to learn a couple tricks for carving pumpkins: - dont cut out the top to scoop out the seeds, cut out the bottom instead. this way the pumpkin doesnt cave in on itself and lasts longer - sprinkle some cinnamon inside at the top after carving. this way when you put the candle in it smells like pumpkin pie topsiders-tanlines this is the quality content I wanna see

Pro Tips For Spooky Season

funny memes about law, crime, legal system, criminal law, tumblr, tumblr posts, tweets, funny tweets, courtroom, judge | sextronautt can lawyers argue without crying lightspeedsound am lawyer and let tell gets like super close dude Source: sextronautt 1,277,233 notes

Funny Memes That Live At The Intersection Of Law And Crime

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Tumblr Thread on Patrol Ghost Ship Submarines | pipistrellus STILL ON PATROL learned something new and horrifying today which is no submarine is ever considered "lost there is apparently tradition U.S. Navy no submarine is ever lost. Those go sea and do not return are considered be "still on patrol There is monument about this along canal near here its worst thing have ever seen says "STILL ON PATROL huge letters and then goes on specify exactly many WWII submarine ghosts are STILL OUT THERE

Tumblr Thread: The Still On-Patrol Submarines

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Employee wins company holiday raffle, office manager demands they hand over the prize to a colleague who's retiring: ‘My ticket was in there fair and square’

Employee wins company holiday raffle, office manager demands they hand over the prize to a colleague who's retiring: ‘My ticket was in there fair and square’

Entitled mom pressures a coworker to give up 1 week of PTO because her vacation time is more important than their anniversary: 'She said parents should get priority'

Entitled mom pressures a coworker to give up 1 week of PTO because her vacation time is more important than their anniversary: 'She said parents should get priority'

Company forces employee to absorb coworker's job after they quit, but does it gradually to keep employee from noticing, they protest: 'My calendar is packed'

Company forces employee to absorb coworker's job after they quit, but does it gradually to keep employee from noticing, they protest: 'My calendar is packed'

Underpaid and overworked employee demands a $170,000 raise, management laughs in his face, so he leaves to make $180,000, and takes the entire team with him: '[The] satisfaction and vindication is incredible!'

Underpaid and overworked employee demands a $170,000 raise, management laughs in his face, so he leaves to make $180,000, and takes the entire team with him: '[The] satisfaction and vindication is incredible!'

Grandma draws the ire of "unschooling" daughter-in-law after giving her iPad-kid 4th-grade granddaughter a real book to read instead of her iPad: 'She actually needs to practice reading not listening'

Grandma draws the ire of "unschooling" daughter-in-law after giving her iPad-kid 4th-grade granddaughter a real book to read instead of her iPad: 'She actually needs to practice reading not listening'

Retail worker reprimanded for working overtime, then gets reprimanded again for staying exactly on schedule: 'He’s threatening a write up. For doing exactly what he told me to do'

Retail worker reprimanded for working overtime, then gets reprimanded again for staying exactly on schedule: 'He’s threatening a write up. For doing exactly what he told me to do'

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