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monday thru friday job hunt finance career - 8428250368
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Vain, whose real name is Paige A. Jennings, had been an intern at Lazard Asset Management for about seven months. Her twitter, @TheVeronicaVain, is full of gems, but this sums it up best:

I left finance because if I'm going to take it up the ass for a decade, I'd prefer to get in to a hall of fame for it.

(h/t Business Insider.)
(Insider? But I just...)

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Of course, if I know this show, he probably did. Or at least Danny Devito did. He's shorter and it would be easier to launch him into Jobland.

~OLJ

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Qualifications

I constantly hunger for a challenge. I have a very cann-do attitude. I am a team player, and have experience spearheading team projects.

federal government idiot job hunt public sector - 5106894592
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It's hard to tell if "complete idiot" refers to the intelligence level required for the book or the intelligence level required for the job.

Political humor!

~OLJ