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Take your wife and kids with you to work.

Because apples are delicious and nutritious, neither of which are qualities of which the iPad or a rock can boast.

Woo, look at me, being all fancy and not leaving my prepositions at the end of sentences. I should be shamed off the internet.

~OLJ

The draft of this post-modern magical-realist coming of age story says I'm a Copywriter, but the Jameson and Charleston Chew says Art Director. I might have to reevaluate my job responsibilities.

-Water Cooler Chris

See, this is why I do all of my work on a typewriter and force the interns to transcribe it for me. Forget all of these fanboy wars, my Remington will do the trick.

-Water Cooler Chris

Of course, on days where anything important needs to happen, this distribution changes to just "pen not working" over the whole page.