oh god why

Your palms are now sweating.

I don't want to blow your mind or anything, but the key to the recipe is to wrap the Oreos in the bacon... then fry them together. I know. It's nuts. Now if you'll excuse me I'll be in the corner dying while thinking about thse.

The pizza is only available in Australia for now. If and when this thing ever hits the states, prepare for all of our health insurance premiums to rise.

Matt Stonie doesn’t savor his food, he demolishes it.

Five years ago, the competitive eater challenged himself to eat a massive burrito as quickly as possible, and he managed to do it in about 15 minutes, according to The Mirror.

To celebrate having 500k followers on YouTube, he recently tried it again and completely crushed his previous record.

“Burritozilla,” as it is called, weighs 5 pounds and is 18-inches long.

Watch him scarf it down in about 1 minutes and 50 seconds.

Stonie has participated in plenty of other food challenges in the past, which you an check out on his YouTube channel, involving pretty much anything you can imagine, including bacon, poutine, egge nog, Twinkies and marshmallow Peeps.

This delightful monstrosity is available at The Carving Board in Los Angeles. Worth it? Worth it.

The cruel overlord of food over at The Vulgar Chef calls it a "French Fry Burger Bomb" (because "the burger that f**ked your mom" didn't quite work). We just call it beautiful, delicious death.

The mad scientist/insulin lobbyist who made this concoction apparently cooked up some butter and marshmallows in a saucepan before adding in the fruity pebbles in order to make the perfect cone.

It's got everything your favorite taco-inspired ice cream snack has, with one extra special ingredient...