mario

PUT THEM ALL IN MY MOUTH NOW.

Mario's good at a lot of things: Running, jumping, getting big, turning into a fire dude, being a doctor, plumbing, painting, and driving a go kart. 

One thing he's not particularly good at is being a real-live human being. 

YouTuber CrowbCat made a few modifications to the trailer for Super Mario Odyssey, the game that sticks Mario in a realistic urban setting, which only highlights how weird looking Mario really is. He did them one better, stucking a 6-foot tall Mario inside Grand Theft Auto, so you can see how gross it is for Mario to go to the strip club. Weird. 

See: 



via CrowbCat

The idea of Mario, not only disrespecting Peach this way, but also engaging in any type of sexual situation makes me sick to my stomach. But aside from that, you can see Mario drive and explode in a helicopter, fall off a building, and meet a hail of gunfire at the hands of the Liberty City Police. 



via CrowbCat

Game enthusiast and modder RetroBrad developed a re-make of Super Mario Brothers using an eight-by-eight pixel screen. The game is kept largely in-tact by condensing characters and environments into simple single-pixel creations. Way rad!

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