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Make a list and never follow up on it. That's the way to procrastinate. Luckily you can just as easily procrastinate with a bunch of hilarious lists. Win-win.
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Brother and sister track down their absent biological father, demanding to know why he never reached out, he claims he had no idea they even existed: ‘They don't believe me’
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Engineer agrees to help friend’s mother-in-law with renovation as a favor, quits when she treats him like a servant: '[She] learned that professionals can in fact walk away'
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‘Fate had my back’: Employee takes company truck to interview for another workplace after repeatedly being denied days off, gets the new job while on the clock
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Homeowner vigorously defends his lawn from neighbor's 9-year-old, who is digging holes in his yard while looking for “buried treasure,” parents get defensive and refuse to step in: ‘This is my yard. You can’t dig here’
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Overworked employee starts leaving right at 5pm making their boss think that they've suddenly got better at their job and have "stepped up their game": 'I got a raise after I started leaving exactly at 5pm'
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