writing

Writers across Twitter are bonding with one another over the phrases that seem to be terribly overused throughout literature. 

Everyone knows you don't just copy and paste from Wikipedia! You've gotta change some of those sentences around and throw in some synonyms to throw em off your trail. Students have always been pretty stupid. Are they getting dumber? Who knows. Maybe these days we just have much better ways of documenting the stupid. For more, here are teachers sharing the dumbest essays turned in by students.

Keaton Patti is a wonderfully weird writer who's behind other "bot written" scripts such as this John Wick script, as well as this Diner's Drive-Ins and Dives script. He claims that each one is written by a computer program that has consumed over a thousand hours of their respective content, but since the amount of content for each doesn't come close to a thousand hours, we're not so sure about that process. Either way, we love these.

We're huge fans of the bizarre and creative parody work of Keaton Patti (see this hilarious Bot written Olive Garden Commercial script) and the Austin Powers movies hold a nostalgic, groovy place in our hearts. So we'd imagine a cross between the two would be a pretty fantastic thing. And boy, is it.

Turns out "potty talk" is way more fun when it's applied to space. Science Fiction/Fantasy Author Mary Robinette, managed to answer just about every possible question we could imagine when it comes to using the bathroom in space. If you've ever wondered what the smells are like up there far above the globe, or how it goes if you puke in space, you're in luck. This viral Twitter thread covers it all. 

Comedy writer @Keatonpatti tweeted a few pages of a John Wick movie supposedly written by a robot. We're not sure if there's a thousand hours of John Wick out there but what he's produced is on point, action packed, and amazing. He's also released these hilarious "bot written" Olive Garden and Diners Drive-Ins and Dives scripts. Technology is amazing.

Obvious Plant makes parody and spoof products that are hilariously, fantastically weird. And we love them. From anger advice to themed ponchos, to food-grade hair, Obvious Plant has got your needs covered.

All we want to know at this point in the game, is did he pass with flying colors, get the A+, and the green light? Who's to say. What we do know is that this dude did not hold back on the effort, and pouring his thirsty heart out into his persuasive essay. 

If you haven't seen these types of Antiques Roadshow gems made by writer @KeatonPatti, then you're in for a unique and funny wild ride. Part nostalgic nod and part writing exercise, these reimagined antiques have made us laugh too hard. The same dude who made these is also responsible for similarly absurd "bot-written" scripts like this Olive Garden commercial.

You wake up with this pressing feeling that you've just come up with the most genius thought. Maybe it's an idea for a screenplay or a song, and the only way to get it out of your head is to get it on paper. Then the next morning you find your masterpiece. And it just says "gorilla napkins." Weird thoughts just make perfect sense when you're asleep.Twitter knows.

Before there was Netflix and Chill, there was Fencing or Frenching. This young woman's ludicrous tale is one hell of a medieval-esque emotional rollercoaster. Apparently you can find the original script that inspired the eventual Twitter thread, over here.

Hilariously creative writer Keaton Patti is at it again with the opening pages to a script he claims were written by a computer algorithm. He's done this before with a Diners, Drive-Ins and Dives script as well as an Olive Garden Commercial. At this point we know there is no computer program, and it's just Keaton's absurdist style, but he nails it perfectly.

This person somehow managed to write a craigslist ad that made the world's most boring, practical car sound exciting. The Toyota Avalon. It's what you deserve.

D.L. Jennings shares the kind of achievement-ridden story, brimming with impossible levels of productivity and steel fortitude to back, that'll inspire the rest of us on some level (while feeling lazy AF) to get shit done. Seriously, the story behind the creation of his book, "Gift of the Shaper" is an amazing tale in its own right. The fact Jennings put this together amidst 14 years of active duty (thank you for your service) is damn impressive. Check out his Facebook page over here if you're looking to snag a copy of his book, or read more about him. 

The twitter handle @BotRamsay randomly generates a Kitchen Nightmares episode title every 10 minutes. That's right. Every 10 minutes. It has tweeted almost 65 thousand episodes since its inception. Here are some of the recent offerings.

There are two types of people in this world: people who write reviews, and people who don't. Oh, and then there are the people who write hilarious, creative reviews about the most random items on Amazon and fill our grey days with a rare glow of sunshine and laughter. The best jokes are unexpected ones, and these can never be expected. Never. Who would have thought that a review about tissues could be funny? Not I, until I found this. Dig in guys, and enjoy.