Being a corporate suit is like being a hamster in a cage. Your life is pretty plushy, but at the end of the day, all you do is run around on that little wheel of yours, while you mindlessly imagine what it's like in the real outdoors. The corporate cage turns nepo babies, rich folks, and country club members into feral wolves, while it turns the rest of us into handsome blonde rodents with a 2 year life span . Hang in there, Hamtaro, the wheel will keep spinning even when you stop running, so p…

Hey Siri, how do you say, "I quit my job, I have no money, please don't rob me" in Spanish?

This one is for the employees with one foot out the door.

It seems like every time you clock in a little piece of you gets eaten away. Work has that effect on people, especially in the corporate world. Just because you “spice up” your cubicle with pictures of tropical vacations doesn't mean you're any closer to getting that week-long PTO request approved. And just because you do excellent work in your department doesn't mean you're going to get that raise– in fact, your boss will probably just give you more work to do as a reward for your success. If…

Commuting to work must be the biggest waste of time known to man. You sit in traffic on the freeway for 45 minutes with a stale drive through coffee in your hand, meetings to panic about, and road rage in your heart . Now imagine if your office was only 10 steps away from your bedroom? 20 steps away from your kitchen and fully stocked cupboard? Not only do you have full access to all of the luxuries of home (snacks, good coffee, comfortable pants, and your pets), but your "commute" takes about…

The door isn't wide enough.

Going to work is undoubtedly the lamest necessary evil in our lives. Not only are you wasting 8 precious hours each day, but you're lining the pockets of some nepo-baby CEO who's only ever worked on his yacht racing 'career' and assembling his Burning Man looks. While your boss may have never worked a day in their life, you're all too familiar with the creaking sounds of the freeway when it's commuter traffic time, that feeling when you skip breakfast because you're running late to the office,…

The three day weekend has me feeling rested, rejuvenated, and it inspired a new-found hatred for my job

I need to close all the job application tabs before sharing my screen on Zoom

I want to go home

Why do I have to work today? I just want to be happy.

My customer service voice is not a reflection of who I am as a person.

We go to work because we want money, simple as that. No sane person is clocking in everyday because they love the “company culture”, pathetic Dominos pizza parties, or because they want to engage in (near) slave labor to make corporate CEO's fat and happy. If you're on that grind this week and you're feeling the Monday blues hit harder than ever, sometimes the only way to cope is to check out some memes– even if it's just to know that you're not the only one who hates your job. Sure, you're cou…

Ahh, it's Monday morning again. Your coffee is weak, the train was delayed, and you already have 186 unread emails in your inbox– it's gonna be a rough week. But where did the weekend go? Two days of leisure were simply consumed by errands that you had no time for during the week, weren't you supposed to relax at some point? Once again, Saturday morning leaked into Sunday night and now you're trapped in the corporate hellscape known as the Sunday Scaries. It's that feeling you get on Sunday eve…

Quit your job and just ride your tandem bike in the sun

It's 2023 and our complaints about work are still going strong!