the onion

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It Almost Makes You Think About the Penitentary System or Something

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Yes, the Doctor is Definitely the Idiot Here

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Flying Just Isn't the Same These Days

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The Hard Body, the Hot Blood, and the Holy Spirit

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We All Have Our Own Personal Gorillas to Deal With

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This is One of Those Onion Headlines That's too Close to True

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We Also Didn't Think People Could be This Dumb

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The Lombardi Trophy of Broken Dreams

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Sometimes True, Sometimes False, Always a Fail

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These Geniuses Finally Have Woody Allen by the Short Hairs

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Yes, He's Stupid... And He's Not the Only One...

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Hobbits Are Real U Guis!

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Another Victim of The Onion

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More Dangerous Than Ever Imagined

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Perfect Timeline Placement

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The Onion's 5 Tips to Succeed as a Woman in the Office

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Entitled HOA board members demand that new homeowners give up their designated space for another neighbor, homeowners refuse: 'Peg didn't like that. Not one bit'

Entitled HOA board members demand that new homeowners give up their designated space for another neighbor, homeowners refuse: 'Peg didn't like that. Not one bit'

Full-time employee informed he's going part-time despite having to complete the same amount of work per day: 'I didn't see how all this work could get done'

Full-time employee informed he's going part-time despite having to complete the same amount of work per day: 'I didn't see how all this work could get done'

HOA Karen building manager, tries to force out tenant so her friend can move into the building, tenant gets the owner involved, who fires her and doubles her rent: 'she couldn’t afford to pay the full rent'

HOA Karen building manager, tries to force out tenant so her friend can move into the building, tenant gets the owner involved, who fires her and doubles her rent: 'she couldn’t afford to pay the full rent'

58-year-old essential employee gets laid off 1 year before retiring, entire team quits out of loyalty, HR begs them to come back for double their original pay: 'I'll come back for 13 weeks'

58-year-old essential employee gets laid off 1 year before retiring, entire team quits out of loyalty, HR begs them to come back for double their original pay: 'I'll come back for 13 weeks'

Former homeschooler begs parents not to homeschool their kids: 'If you think you'll be a good teacher, you're wrong'

Former homeschooler begs parents not to homeschool their kids: 'If you think you'll be a good teacher, you're wrong'

58-year-old employee gets let go, the rest of the department leaves, HR begs for employee to come back 4 months later: 'That's not going to work for me'

58-year-old employee gets let go, the rest of the department leaves, HR begs for employee to come back 4 months later: 'That's not going to work for me'