the onion

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It Almost Makes You Think About the Penitentary System or Something

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Yes, the Doctor is Definitely the Idiot Here

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Flying Just Isn't the Same These Days

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The Hard Body, the Hot Blood, and the Holy Spirit

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We All Have Our Own Personal Gorillas to Deal With

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This is One of Those Onion Headlines That's too Close to True

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We Also Didn't Think People Could be This Dumb

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The Lombardi Trophy of Broken Dreams

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Sometimes True, Sometimes False, Always a Fail

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These Geniuses Finally Have Woody Allen by the Short Hairs

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Yes, He's Stupid... And He's Not the Only One...

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Hobbits Are Real U Guis!

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Another Victim of The Onion

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More Dangerous Than Ever Imagined

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Perfect Timeline Placement

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The Onion's 5 Tips to Succeed as a Woman in the Office

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Employee gets fired 2 weeks after her wedding because her company doesn't want to add her spouse to her insurance: 'Friday morning, my performance was fantastic, I was getting praised, how would I suddenly be fired for my performance on Monday afternoon?'

Employee gets fired 2 weeks after her wedding because her company doesn't want to add her spouse to her insurance: 'Friday morning, my performance was fantastic, I was getting praised, how would I suddenly be fired for my performance on Monday afternoon?'

CEO demands to be CC'd on every email sent within the company, only for their inbox to be flooded when HR sends a personalized email to every employee: ‘They caused their own email apocalypse’

CEO demands to be CC'd on every email sent within the company, only for their inbox to be flooded when HR sends a personalized email to every employee: ‘They caused their own email apocalypse’

21-year-old employee avoids boss's demands to shovel snow: 'I had already planned not to go... because it wasn't my job'

21-year-old employee avoids boss's demands to shovel snow: 'I had already planned not to go... because it wasn't my job'

Architect reprimanded for making daughter’s birthday invitation on work laptop, so she refused to use personal phone for on-site job photos, forcing boss to buy her company Samsung and pay for entire second trip to the site: 'I doubled all the expenses'

Architect reprimanded for making daughter’s birthday invitation on work laptop, so she refused to use personal phone for on-site job photos, forcing boss to buy her company Samsung and pay for entire second trip to the site: 'I doubled all the expenses'

Karen dog owner demands vet clinic receptionist cancel the next appointment so she can come in: 'Some folks act like a full schedule is optional!'

Karen dog owner demands vet clinic receptionist cancel the next appointment so she can come in: 'Some folks act like a full schedule is optional!'

IT demands employee submit a separate ticket to get access to each folder they need, leading employee to submit hundreds of tickets within an hour until they give in: ‘Stop winding up IT’

IT demands employee submit a separate ticket to get access to each folder they need, leading employee to submit hundreds of tickets within an hour until they give in: ‘Stop winding up IT’