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A Few Compelling Reasons to Not Have Kids

If you're the kind of person who likes sleeping and not cleaning chocolate sauce out of your couch, it's good to think really hard about the decision to have kids. Kids are stupid and weird and disaster tends to follow them, so let these be a reminder. We remember being weird and dumb kids, and we're not sure if we'd want to deal with us.

Big messes kids made | child sitting on the floor with colored pens drawing on a white dog | young kid smearing chocolate syrup on a cushion of a white couch while two dogs watch from behind
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Misfortune Monday: Messes Large and Small

There's something about strange and specific mishaps that have the power to put things in perspective. Even if it's a boring day, you can make that day seem slightly better when you realize you probably didn't have paint explode in your living room or a boulder land on your car.

Chaos, fails, mistakes and messes | accidentally sawing through a measuring tape | Ryder truck broken crushed semi trailer
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Cats Messing Stuff Up

Sure, cats can be friendly and affectionate, but sometimes it becomes clear that you're dealing with an animal that has no concept of empathy and can't comprehend why a jug of tomato sauce should stay on a counter. To compliment their pampered hypocrisy, here's Tumblr agreeing that cats talk like disparaged victorian children, and this history of how cats became domesticated.

Funny images of cats ruining things | white cat with spots sticking its head through a hole in a purple wall | grey cat sitting on top of a pizza slice in a cardboard box
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Misfortune Monday: Strange and Specific Mishaps

Unfortunate things happen all the time, but they usually fall under the category of "typical crap that happens to everybody." Here are some unfortunate moments of failure and chaos that you don't really expect, like 10,000 cracked eggs or a Frisbee in your windshield.

Funny, wtf and weird chaos, misfortune and fails | trash bin overflowing with unbaked raw dough | car stuck in a big road pothole with its back end sticking in the air
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Unfortunate Moments of Chaos and Failure

Don't get too comfortable when things are going well, because life just might hit you hard with unfortunate failures and moments of chaos. Someone could fall through your roof, your car could get hit with a rogue coconut, and a dog could eat your shoes. There are limitless possibilities when it comes to unfortunate moments and chaos.

Chaotic moments of failure, messes, mistakes and misfortune | car that got painted white while parking. santa claus getting arrested by a police officer.
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Moments That Are Good Reasons To Not Have Kids

They get into your stuff, ruin your things and draw on the dog. Sometimes kids are weird and dumb in a funny way, but other times they're dumb in a destructive and frustrating way. From the huge messes to the irrational meltdowns, it's better for some people to not have to deal with parenting.

Children being frustrating and messy | pic of a baby smearing the contents of a discarded chocolate syrup bottle all over a white couch and their own face, two dogs are watching from behind. pic of a toddler sitting inside an aquarium and putting a tube from the water filtering system in their mouth.
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Unfortunate Moments When Failure and Chaos Reigned

Just when things are going well, someone falls through the ceiling. You can never be too sure how things will go wrong next, but one thing's for sure and that's that the universe will never run out of ways to screw people over. Unfortunate moments punctuate our lives, and add a heaping helping of chaos and failure.

Unlucky moments of chaos, fails and messes | hide the pain harold standing next to a car with a clamp on its wheels. person's legs hanging from a crumbling hole in the ceiling.
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Chaotic Moments of Misfortune and Failure

Life is unpredictable, and some unfortunate moments are bound to happen. All you can really do is take them in stride and take some solace in the fact that other people also have to deal with life's unfortunate failures and moments of chaos. There's runaway tires, lumber spills on the freeway, and deceptively baked bread. Given the option, you kinda hope for the bread one.

Fails, messes, mistakes, chaos on misfortune | broken window, loose tire on top of a car's hood, hole in the wall. slice of casserole on top of a melted plastic plate inside an over.
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Messy and Convincing Reasons to Not Have Kids

There's no question that kids are stupid creatures. We don't hate them, we're just impartial enough to acknowledge that they're dumb little idiots who make a lot of stupid mistakes, are boring to talk to, and have meltdowns over the dumbest things. Again, we do not hate children. That said, they are in fact, a hassle, as the following images go to show.

Children making messes and generally being terrible.
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19 Disappointing Times Life Was Relentless

Some days are worse than others. Most likely, your day was good enough that you can find some comfort in seeing how comically worse it was for someone else.

fail memes
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25 Moments That Ensured People Would Have a Bad Day

Just goes to show that at any given moment, you're at the mercy of the universe. Especially if you've already messed up your day through your own devices.

bad luck unlucky unfortunate pics
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21 Times Life Decided to Give People a Hard Time

You may be having a bad day. But at least you didn't run a cargo ship into another cargo ship. Most Likely.

What we're trying to say is, maybe your mediocre day has actually been a pretty good day in disguise. Here's some people who have without a  doubt gone through a rough patch.

Sad pics bad sucks twitter news messes destruction cars funny boats - 6930693
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