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28 Decent Reasons Not To Have Children

There's too much proof out there that kids are stupid and weird. Sure, they have a few legitimate reasons for their uncontrollable dumbness, like the fact that their brains aren't done developing. But that's not enough. These things will walk around like they own the place, getting their heads stuck in fences and spilling syrup everywhere. Kids are just weird and stupid people.

kids making mistakes and being dumb
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Via Cracked
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Star Wars "Legends" content has always been pretty variable in quality, but we're not interested in the safe stuff like Thrawn or Mara Jade—we're talkin' Luke seducing multiple dead girls, Leia trying to delay puberty through dance, and Jedi masters named after, uh, self love. This is Canonball.

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Via Charger
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Alright, I can't be the only one thinking that this sounds exactly like a cow trying to meow. With that being said, still wouldn't mess with this dude. 

Via swebounce
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Honestly, this is wildly impressive. This guy's grip strength is heroic. Never thought about what it'd be like to try and sit in a robotic chair, but this guy went and did the dang thing. Props. 

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Demanding Customer Wastes Their Own Time for Four Cents

Sure, if the hill you're willing to die on costs four cents out of the charity bin, go ahead and die on that hill. Customers sometimes make demands with stupid implications, like this customer who wanted a pound of chicken wings and got less wings or this guy who demanded to ride in a go kart with no engine.

Ridiculous customer waits their time for pennies | r/MaliciousCompliance Posted by u/Wraith347 7 hours ago Cuss out over pennies? Oh get pennies. oc M Longtime lurker, so thought share my favorite story my time foodservice, years and years ago shy, quiet 15-year-old first started working at certain fast food restaurant my small town. Then encountered general public. Many morning rush customers were super kind regulars who got know and liked. But then there Penny Guy.
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Wholesome Memes For a Serving of Positivity

Life can seem like a big swirling pool of negativity sometimes, but it's important to remember that you have the ability to stop and focus on what's important. It's probably better for us in the long run to spend at least some time thinking about the things that make us happy, and baby that meanswholesome memes for a shot of niceness.

funny wholesome nice memes
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Tumblr Story: Snowplow Loses To Dad's Steel Enforced Mailbox

For whatever reason some people that walk this world like to make other people's life a waking nightmare. Take this snowplow driver; the snowplow driver would literally go out of his way to destroy a man's mailbox. So, dad did what any calculative and clever human being with a taste for executing a well warranted pro revenge would do; and dad proceeded to upgrade his mailbox to be a steel enforced monster of a thing. The rest is history and deserves its place in the hall of fame for revenges. 

For another case of satisfying pro revenge check out the time a senior manager got an employee fired, so the employee turned the tables.

A funny Tumblr post about a nasty snowplow dude losing to a steel enforced mailbox | Let's see little punks smash my letterbox now aerylon Folgen This reminds this guy who used live on my dad's street. Every time snowed snow plow would take out his mailbox and only his mail box. And just be clear done
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Dude's Security Question Results In Awkward Moment With Customer Service

Many of us have wrestled with the profound conundrum that is trying to remember what our dang security questions are, for when it's time to login to various online services, like banks. For whatever reason this dude decided to make his security question very personal. And the answer that they provided was nothing short of gold. Can't imagine what kind of beautiful awkward silence must've been present during this call. 

Dude's security question ends up resulting in a very awkward moment with a customer service representative.
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Tumblr Thread: Researchers Are Ridiculous With Naming Things

So many of us take for granted just how ridiculous some of the names of scientific things are. It's fun to take a moment and appreciate what kinds of wild thought processes went into naming various objects of observation. For some more gold from Tumblr check out this post about how trees are low key monsters. Just a tad bit unnerving. 

A funny Tumblr thread about how ridiculous researchers are when it comes to naming things.
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The Most Dangerous Things People Have Eaten

We've all heard stories about stuff like poisonous blowfish, but when you really think about it, there's a surprising number of foods that can kill you. It's not just poisonous foods, but also strange and specific allergies, extremely dodgy and less than hygienically stuff, or just something you might just choke on. There's a wide world of dangerous food out there, and many of us have found ourselves on the wrong end of the spoon. People will also eat the worst things, simply out of politeness.

spoiled, poisonous, and dangerous food people ate
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Attempt To Buy Easter Cake Results In Fail-Packed Saga

Holidays can be a tricky business. Oftentimes lavish foods are involved, and of course, the cakes. Oh boy, the cakes. Some folks just go for it and break out their best homemade recipes, while other people bank on their local bakeries/grocery stores pulling through with the clutch cakes. This is pretty much worst-case scenario that we have going on here. The intentions were pure from the very start, but the fails almost seem like they were inevitable. 

Woman's mission to acquire an Easter cake ends up resulting in hilarious cake fail.
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Guy Prescribes Dose of Own Medicine to Scammer

If a scammer tries to get at your hard-earned money, you're justified in, nay obligated to, feed them a bunch of absurd lies and waste their afternoon with your goofdom. It's simply what's done. For some extra scammer drama, here are some influencers getting called out for their lobster scam as well as Scammy Tammy wasting a seller's time with her dumb scam.

scammer contacts guy and he wastes time
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TV Gets Damaged In Transit, Company Loses Millions

Man, what a prime example of how it can really just benefit a company to do the right thing when they have the chance. For whatever reason this company felt compelled to not fork over the $600 that they should've for a broken TV. Well, that BS decision went on to cost them dearly. 

TV gets damaged in transit, so company proceeds to lose millions | r/ProRevenge Join u/Champion5 3y Damage my TV transit and deny claim? No more shipments Not sure if this is "Pro" quality but some have asked post this here since they think is. 10 years ago moved my job had forgot about one my TV's back home and asked my dad ship on my companies account since they paid my move couple days later delivery driver Shipping Company drops off box heavily damaged so didn't sign He waited while
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Hilarious And Aggressively Petty Posts From Neighbors On Nextdoor

Anyone who has ever moved into a new place knows that the experience can be marked by a bit of stress over what your new neighbors are going to be like. It can be a bit of a gamble. Sometimes, you think you're moving into a place next to a perfectly reasonable human being, and then come to find out that they're nothing short of a waking nightmare. The folks that are featured in this collection of ridiculous posts on the infamous Nextdoorneighbor app seem like they could be quite the handful. 

A collection of hilarious and aggressively petty posts from neighbors on Nextdoor.
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Entitled Folks and Their Unconventional Audacity

The absurd audacity of entitled people knows no limits. There's a kind of personality out there who's able to jump through as many logical hoops as it takes to make any self-serving request seem reasonable. There are bosses who will expect workers to pay for their own materials, landlords who see no problem asking people to pay 6 months up front, and complete strangers who will get angry at you for not sharing your Netflix password. It's amazing, watching how laughably bold entitled people will get.

Entitled people and their demands
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