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Creative Misuses of The English Language

English is a big amorphous blob of a language, and it's difficult to say the right things even when you care about what you're saying. Throw in the fact that a lot of people only know some of it add a dash of "good enough" and you've got yourself some blunderous failures of the English language. But at least there's the consolation that if you want to buy a shirt that says "Pervert" in big red letters, you have options.

funny English language failures
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Blunderous Failures of The English Language

Whether English is your first language or not, people still have an extremely hard time navigating the finer points of spelling and wordology. These blunderous foibles of the English language drive home the fact that a one-letter mistake can mean a whole lot of difference, and even spelling something phonetically can lead to catastrophically regrettable spelling fails

funny spelling failures and mistakes in English
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Blunderous Foibles of The English Language

If there's anything to learn from all the regrettable and dumb spelling fails we see on a daily basis, it's that absolutely no one is immune to really stupid mistakes when it comes to their mastery of the English language. Non-native speakers and people who have been speaking English their whole lives all succumb to the fun and frustration of the English language, and at this rate it looks like there's no way to stop it.

funny english fails and spelling mistakes
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This is wildly disorienting. It's like he's speaking English, but whatever he's saying is also incomprehensible at the same time. 

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Insightful Tumblr Thread Breaks Down Meanings Of Different Figures Of Speech

Just a quick reminder that you're great, and the english language actually supports that theory! 

figures of speech | dalekitsune phrase "curiosity killed cat" is actually not full phrase actually is "curiosity killed cat but satisfaction brought back" so don't let anyone tell not be curious little baby okay go and be interested world uwu consultingmoosecaptain See also: Blood is thiekerthan water blood covenant is thicker than water womb. Meaning relationships formed by choice are stronger than those formed by birth | espurr-roba Let's not forget Jack all trades, master none" ends with "But
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Guy Tries To Pretend He Doesn't Know English, Fails Hard

This guy made a grave mistake. And that mistake was one of him trying to tell a lady asking for money that he didn't speak English, while he very well did the whole time. It's tough to pull off the whole "I don't speak your language" thing when you're literally speaking their language right back to them. 

Guy tries to pretend that he doesn't know English and he fails miserably | MrWittyResponse TIFU by telling lady asking money didn't speak English perfect English So late at night and had make stop at gas station fill up my car. This lady comes up wearing this really baggy hoodie. Judging by appearances she seemed be substance abuser. She says she's pregnant and needs some cash pay her motel room really wasn't buying she
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Tumblr Post: Former English Teacher Defends Controversial Christmas Song

It's that time of the year again. With the holiday season in full bloom, it's time to steer our attention to that one Christmas song that never fails to stir up the spicy debate about what it's exactly getting at. We have a former English teacher chime in on a tweet that condemns the infamous song, "Baby It's Cold Outside", with their analysis of what the song actually represents. 

A former English teacher ends up defending a controversial Christmas song. | Andrew Rannells @AndrewRannells don't think any more people need record Baby 's Cold Outside think good there. teachingwithcoffee 's time bring an end Rape Anthem Masquerading As Christmas Carol
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A Quick Tumblr Post Appreciating Riddles

Most everyone loves a good old fashioned riddle. They make your brain run around in circles, desperately trying to dig up the answer, and they also make for great distractions during stressful times. Maybe this Tumblr post will inspire everyone to share their own favorite riddles. Check out some more gold from Tumblr with this thread that delves into the unsettling reason for unrealistic animation.

A quick Tumblr post appreciates riddles | teaboot love weirdly specific rules go with answering riddle. Like Have Two Eyes But Cannot See Am And answer's supposed be word 'iridescent' because 'two s' right, but like. Why can't answer be like guy with really bad cataracts. Someone wearing blindfold. My uncle's dog. Like why does gotta be deep teaboot have face but no eyes lips or nose am Slenderman. Next
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Quick Tumblr Post Defends English Language

This quick and entertaining Tumblr post makes some solid points about how much more complex and confusing the English language could truly be. 

A quick Tumblr post defends the English language | theaustinstollhaus people go off about English is worst language just wanna point out few things Our future tense requires only one word (looking at Spanish Words don't change meanings depending on tone (Cantonese don't live some bizarre Beauty And Beast world where give inanimate objects genders (romance languages, German)
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Attempts At The English Language That Failed Miserably

Fully grasping any language is no easy matter. It's tough. And the English language is filled to the brim with difficulties it doesn't get enough credit for. Especially those strange spellings that just don't match up with how we envision the word being spelled, due to how it sounds. These attempts at the English language just crashed and burned in a pit of fail. 

A collection of various English language attempts that failed miserably | ofools not gonna say again BOG is wetland is acidic FEN is wetland is alkaline vampireapologist FINALLY someone said quasi-normalcy SWAMP is wetland whose vegetation consists trees or other woody plants MARSH is wetland with other forms vegetation lesbianshepard LITTLE LOUDER PEOPLE BACK
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AskReddit Thread: English Language Rules That Baffle People

Someone on AskReddit got a fun thread going that has people who picked up English later in life, or as a second language, describing the parts about the language that baffles them the most. Learning new languages is certainly not an easy thing to do. Maybe some folks that have muddled through the disorienting process of learning a new language, or picking up English, will connect on a deeply painful level with these replies. 

A collection of AskReddit replies to people's struggles learning English | arnoldone 12h Why are there words even though they are spelled exactly same, they are pronounced different based on context guy is an invalid, he is bound his bed strategy used is invalid shouldnt have ever been accepted read every night read whole book while on plane.
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Quick List Appreciates English Language Struggles

Word nerds will love this. Everyone else might have some mixed feelings about the strange complexities of the English language. 

A quick list shows off the struggles of navigating the English language | English Game: place word "only" anywhere on sentence She told him she loved him. parkourtoyoutoo: shadowwraiths: Ladies and Gentlemen English Language are doing? STOP. THIS IS NOT FAIR | If can correctly pronounce every word this poem will be speaking English better than 90 native English speakers world. crimsun Dearest creature creation, Study English pronunciation will teach my verse Sounds like corpse, corps, horse, and
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Funny Observations on Language that are Frustratingly Interesting

We know that languages are all weird, and the one we use can be particularly confusing, but that can make it a more fun and nuanced thing to explore. We're all for seeing some creative uses and misuses of the English language. If you just wanna see people totally suck at English, then here are people who failed at using the English language.

Funny and interesting observations on languages.
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People Share Overly Literal and Goofy Translations from Various Languages

Learning the words for things in other languages can be particularly eye opening. From overly literal German translations like "hand shoes" to more poetic euphemisms you'd never think you'd hear, every culture has come up with it's own particular brand of funny words for things. For more, here are non-native English speakers sharing common phrases they wish we had.

Funny and literal translations and phrases from different languages.
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