chicken

You read that right: people can now brave those treacherous roads alongside their nervous chickens, and stay safe thanks to an awesome and silly harness! Here's a link where you can grab one, if you're actually interested in giving this a go with your chicken. 

Otherwise, check out some of the positive reception from Amazon customers below. The whole idea of this is just our kind of ridiculous. But at least we can rest easy at night, now knowing that foolish chickens aren't risking their lives (as often) crossing the road. 

These chickens were just minding their own business trying to make it in this mad and cruel world, when suddenly, they got ruthlessly shamed. And there's just something so helplessly hilarious about a poor, seemingly defenseless chicken getting shamed. 

Apparently, that loveably stupid character was supposed to get more screen time, but it just didn't pan out. Between marketing and production of the movie, the creators realized they'd have to make a change. Hey, I'm still happy with their work. Also God bless Alan Tudyk, aka Wash aka Pirate Steve. For somefunny and cool knowledge about the original Jurassic Park, check this out.

This is the kind of sh*t that makes the world think Americans are very stupid. What a contaminated mess! 

Is that garlic bread or a sponge? Is that a potato or a rock? These questions and many more will soon be answered. For more photos of delicious looking candles and car parts, check out r/forbiddensnacks. Now someone find me a hot bucket of that lady's delicious looking coat.

This woman was terrified when she saw the way her boyfriend neglected the seasoning of his chicken. Can you BLAME HER?

Everything here is at least just a little wrong. Welcome to a world of mismatched, sloppy discomfort.

"Is that a delicious pile of grapes? Or is it a clutch of terrifying spider eggs?" It's the spider eggs. For more, check out r/ForbiddenSnacks.

Idiotic returns, straight up theft and sloppy slight of hand. These folks are either too dumb to realize they're dumb or they're just too desperate to care.

Life is a series of attempts and failures punctuated by a few successes. Here's to those sad and ironic attempts that just didn't make the cut.

KFC UK took out a full page ad to apologize for the the ridiculous "chicken crisis" they caused earlier this week.

A shipping mix-up has UK KFC customers freaking out over the bird shortage and ensuing "scandal" to smuggle emergency chicken into stores.

I usually order my "medium rare chicken" under it's real name "salmonela."

Twitter, who seems to be having some sort of identity crisis when it comes to food this week, has settled on yet another gross food trend: Medium rare chicken. 

So it seems that we're off of pineapple pizza and dunking pizza in milk and have just commited to killing ourselves with food poisoning. 

I mean, who is this appetizing to: 

Yeezus Christ. Just a quick life pro tip for any tragically lost soul out there, buut chicken not cooked through is a literal recipe for food poisoning disaster. There's this crazy thing called salmonella that a lot of us humans try and steer clear of, and that puke-inducing shittiness has a total knack for coming in on the wave of 'uncooked poultry'.