"We're a family here," your HR will gladly tell new hires—a strained smile, thinly stretched, veiling years of workplace abuse, mistreatment, and exploitative policy that would say directly otherwise. The truth is that the only "family" this workplace resembles is a family on a true crime program where the children are chained in the basement by their remorselessly autocratic parents, who insist that the children should be eternally thankful for every scrap offered to them.