coat

Fur usually doesn't offend me, but those boots are pretty damn offensive.

The best dates are the ones who go by the "close your eyes and smear lipstick all over your face" philosophy. It's very popular south of the border.

...but it's been such a bad winter that I only care how WARM it looks.

Oh, you want me to put on some pants? Sorry, no can do. It's HOT out today.

Big fur coats work well with purple baseball caps apparently.