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Make a list and never follow up on it. That's the way to procrastinate. Luckily you can just as easily procrastinate with a bunch of hilarious lists. Win-win.
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Manager tries to get employee to work during PTO, giving her personal number to a contractor and listing her as on-call for tasks she was never hired to do: ‘I said “absolutely not!” I am taking a paid vacation and will not be coming in’
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Employee resigns, boss tries to cheap out by offering $20 less per hour than what he's worth to keep him on as a contractor: 'Their offer was not acceptable'
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23-year-old contributing to groceries and chores refuses to start paying rent while older brother lives for free at home: 'I made it very clear to my parents'
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Coworker asks employee to clock her in early, then lets the employee get written up when she gets caught: 'I won't be helping her ever again'
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HR requires a 500-word "reason" alongside each PTO request, so a witty employee writes an entire essay to go to their cousin's wedding: 'I began [by] explaining the historical significance of marriage'
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