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Make a list and never follow up on it. That's the way to procrastinate. Luckily you can just as easily procrastinate with a bunch of hilarious lists. Win-win.
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Manager fires employee after a week on the job due to employee noticing they weren't paid for their first day at work and notifying payroll: ‘This isn't working out’
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Child-free aunt refuses to keep helping her entitled sister with nephew’s soccer pickups after being treated like the default chauffeur every week: ‘No please, no asking if I’m free’
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Elderly neighbor demands resident next door stop parking in front of their own house, claiming it's too close to her driveway, resident says: ‘This is not a reasonable ask’
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UPDATE: ‘She decided she doesn’t like me. She has said this directly’: Coworker keeps reporting a 2-month new hire as hostile, formally filing a complaint about an audible sigh, and complaining to their boss for no reason
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Mom charges her daughter $1,100 a month in rent and bills the moment she turns 18, tells her to donate plasma when she can't afford it: 'Why is it my responsibility?'
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