spider

WARNING: SERIOUSLY A TON OF SPIDERS (OR MAYBE DADDY LONGLEGS WHO KNOWS WE CLOSED THE VIDEO TOO QUICKLY). YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED.

In other news, metro Vancouver has gone silent after reports of giant arachnid attack.

He should change his license plate to just say NOPE.

This massive spider could not have found a more inconvenient place to hang out, aside from on your face.

“Nothing worse than opening your car door and feeling something furry!” writes the uploader in the caption.

They found him just chilling beneath the handle, presumably when they stuck their hand up there to open it.

“It’s a bloody super spider,” he says. “Oh jesus!”

Fortunately, for everyone involved, it eventually plops down and scurries away.

For maximum effect, have this playing in the background.

NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE EATING GRAPES FOREVER NOW SORRY NOPE NOPE NO MORE BANANAS FOR ME.

Millions of baby spiders appeared to rain down from the sky earlier this month in the Southern Tablelands in Australia. One resident described the effect it had on their home as such: "The whole place was covered in these little black spiderlings and when I looked up at the sun it was like this tunnel of webs going up for a couple of hundred metres into the sky."

Read that again and try not to let your mind implode from the Lovecraftian horror from it all.

The phenomenon is (terrifyingly) not that uncommon. Apparently the spiders "balloon" by throwing out sheets of webbing and use the winds to carry themselves around. When weather conditions are poor, none of the spiders go anywhere of course. But when the weather picks up again, they all leave in one terrifying hell-swarm.

Again, a salute to the brave (insane?) people who continue to call the continent of Australia their home.