The Great Canadian Blueberry Heist needs to be a movie in my lifetime. That's all there is to it. I will accept nothing less. This is one of those double take-worthy kinds of stories: you see it jump across your social media feed, doubt everything about it, and proceed to have your world rocked as you develop a strange craving for Blueberry Pie. Yo, for real thoug. It's got everything I could want in a slice of crime: the big getaway, the ridiculousness of $100K of blueberries being stolen, and the fact that it's a tale of thievery with Canadian roots.