friends

From the submitter:

I was afraid to ask anyone else

Maybe you could go back in time and text Hitler's grandson. You've been given a terrible curse, but it could also be a great gift. With great power comes great responsibility etc. etc.

They didn't even wish him a happy Thanksgiving in 2009. How rude.

True, but the bard said a lot of strange things...

When a friend telling you another of their friends likes you turns awkward...

It's official: "douche canoe" is now mainstream.