dad

Every Dad ever should be crowned the king of awful jokes.

That's it. If was ever cool before, it's now officially deader than disco.

Dad, we should probably talk about your drinking...

Dad's an equal-opportunity pessimist.

Her father's name is Heidi? What a strange family.

Don't think he won't check your Facebook, either, if he already has your phone under surveillance. Now he'll read all your friends replying to that status with "CONDOLENCES BRO" and other such things.

The couple never had sex again.