...but his parents have just been letting him watch too many terrible sitcoms.
Me: *answers* This is road kill cafe you kill we grill it, this is Sam speaking!
Mom's boyfriend: *hangs up*
Mom: Why'd you do that!?
Me: Don't worry he'll be by to pick up his fried raccoon in an hour.
Dad: You know what I'll do when you bring a boy you like to meet me?
Me(a little worried): What?
Dad: I'll take him out into the yard to talk with him. Make him dig a hole, then bury him in it.
Dad: If you want to date, date somebody who's going to harass you, so I'll at least have an excuse when the police bring me into custody.
A Comic Explaining The World of The Introverts
Dad Finds The Best Way to Keep His Kids Busy For a While
Hey, They Save You The Cost of Buying Some Expensive Toy
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Redneck Engineering: It's Not Dumb if it Works
German Shepherd Hilariously Wakes Up from Deep Sleep
This 11-Year-Old is Hiding a Cool Talent
A Dubstep Street Performer Meets His Match in This Passerby
If Comic Creators Could See Their Characters Now
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