(Me and my dad are walking past a church where a funeral is in progress)
Dad: Why do they always have funerals at churches?
Me: Because it's considered God's home.
Dad: Well why can't God go on the road, Tim Tebow does.
My mother texts me: Hey... Dad wants a ticket to the game in green bay for Christmas... I believe it's a football game and I think it's the Packers against another team... Possibly the Yankees.
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