Mom: OK: No drugs, no alcohol, no sex and no boys.
Dad: Basically we want you to have a sh**ty time.
Me: *answers* This is road kill cafe you kill we grill it, this is Sam speaking!
Mom's boyfriend: *hangs up*
Mom: Why'd you do that!?
Me: Don't worry he'll be by to pick up his fried raccoon in an hour.
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