news headlines

Man, the news sucks tonight! When are we gonna get to the robberies and homicides?

That's one strong plane!

"Police have cornered the suspect who reportedly put as many as 25 words on single line of this text. If caught, he faces...

... a lengthy sentence."

So, uhh... why report the part about the cardigan again?

Wat.

Broken news is more like it

Fire... destroyed by... wut?