batman

It's small green pieces of paper!

Check out more in the lives of Superheroes!

Actual email to actual employees.

Please, dressing for the job you want is how Batman became Batman. He dressed for the job, he drove the car for the job, and he gathered all the tools for the job, and poof! He's Batman! Take all that away and he'd be another CEO who inherited his job. /nerdrant

~Office Lackey Jack

From the submitter:

It's the only explanation I could come up with as to why my remote access token has pointy corners.

The humor blog we need, but not the one we deserve.