wood

"Too early in the morning to be influenced by a "here, hold my beer" moment. My husband's creative helper."

...but sometimes you can only afford the door.

That was a horrible pun. Toro-ly unacceptable. Deerest apologies.

"Bought this car for $300, I finally sold this car when the axle was about to rust out of the frame. I got $300 for it."

Now that's Das Auto! ... Wait, no, that's Volkswagen... You know what, I don't care, it's Das Auto anyway!

A completely different take on the term woody. ~Not-So-Handy Andy

And apparently it petrifies that wood too.

Submitter Hannah Sacks went to go get her mail and came upon this scene. She's sure the neighbors upstairs will be just fine...