satellite dish

"Bought hanging pepper bag, but I didn't have a place to hang it on my balcony, so I lashed a shepherd's crook to my old satellite dish stand with 2 dozen zip strips. It still wasn't sturdy enough, so I jammed a piece of wood in the pipe to lengthen it."

I believe it was the philosopher Young Jeezy who once told us all to stay strapped. Glad to see you're taking his advice!

Meanwhile, inside the automobile...

If there is intelligent life out there and they are watching us, this guy just blew our cover. ~Not-So-Handy Andy

"...but we wanted it on the roof. This is actually how they "installed" our dish... with MY pumpkins. After being told we wanted out on the roof, he said "you don't want it on your new roof. You can plant a bush there and you'll never see it. Or move that wagon over here...it'll be fine."

Okay, I know this breaks about 4 different regulation... but have you seen The Wire??

~NSHA

Revenge is a dish best served cold, and jealousy is a a dish best served satellite.

~NSHA

You know, chillin'. And chilling. ~Not-So-Handy Andy

Decreases your chances of electrocution by 60%. Also, your reception.

~NSHA

Probably won't work during growing season ....