It's easy to become a doctor or a lawyer, but have you ever considered the dedication and skill it takes to hold 10 eggs in one hand? Yeah, take that, working professionals. Anyway here are people doing impressive, weird and specific things that most people would be hard pressed to find themselves doing. In a similar vein, here are times godlike people defied the odds to stick the landing.
If you're going to sign yourself up for skiing down an impossibly overcrowded mountain for the sake of chasing down a world record; it might as well look like you're at the beach while you're at it right? The footage for their attempt turned out pretty damn awesome as well!
I've never grasped how one goes about performing this impressive move without proceeding to eliminate armies of necessary brain cells. Dude, I've had a hard enough time managing to crush beer cans with my forehead on the rowdier, booze-soaked weekends of my life.
Meet Elias Ambühl, one crazy-ass SOB.
He just broke a world record by skiing a mountain at Arosa Ski Resort in Switzerland, reaching speeds of 81.5 mph.
So yeah, this dude's ca-razy.
Now that's not faster than the fastest skiier ever, Ivan Origone, who went 158.4 mph last year. But it's pretty dog-gone fast, especially backwards.
Some people are desperate to break a world record. Very desperate.
On that list of very desperate people is YouTuber Tocen, who broke the world record of my clicks on a mouse in a single video. If you didn't know that that was a record, shame on you!
Tocen clicked his mouse one million times in 17 hours. So if you're looking for something boring, monotonous, and oddly therapeutic, try skipping around in this video a little bit. It's fun to watch this guy just clicking away. Click.
Age ain’t nothing but an excuse.
This 105-year-old man just set a new cycling world record. 105. Years. Old. Our target demo is, like, 14 to 30, which means you have no excuse for spending so much time with those dang video games. X-Box One. More like X-Box None until you set a world record.
The Associated Press reports that Robert Marchand, who had once been told by a coach to give up because he was never going to achieve anything on that bike, “set a world record in the 105-plus age category — created especially for the tireless veteran — by riding 22.547 kilometers (14.010 miles) in one hour.”
Marchand isn’t just a world record holder, he’s spent time during his 105 years working as a firefighter, a truck driver, and a lumberjack, and only took up biking at 68. Man, we’re all so pathetic compared to this dude.
The Huffington Post says that “the cyclist can attribute his athleticism to eating fruits and vegetables, not smoking, drinking wine in moderation, exercising daily and going to bed at 9 p.m.”
Better get to work.
Today in “what hands are actually for,” a Dutch man set a new world record by completing a Rubik’s Cube in under five seconds. The Daily Mail reports that 20-year-old Mats Valk deafeated the Cube in 4.74 seconds, making us look ridiculous because, let's face it, we can barely hold on to our phones for five seconds without dropping them and shattering the screen.
Valks took the record last weekend at the Jawa Timur Open 2016 in Blitar, Indonesia, where humanity actually learned that simply opening doors and holding mugs of coffee were the least of what the human hand was capable of. After a brief look at his Rubik’s Cube, Valks picked up the cube and beat the previous record by .16 seconds. Lucas Etter, the previous record holder, is now like the rest of us, wondering what these 10 digits are actually for. Now, everyone look at your own hands and wonder, what have you done for me lately?
Meanwhile, the only one not asking that is this guy:
Matt Stonie ate 113 silver-dollar pancakes in 8 minutes! If you think you could better than that, it's time to heat up an pan and give it a try.
