wife

you make bad poop, you're gonna get stabbed
Via Metro.UK
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A japanese woman has allegedly slashed her husband across the face after he left the bathroom in a less than usable state. 

The man had been eating Pepper Jack Cheez-Its® (I can only assume it was an unconscionable amount) prior to the dump in question.

Via Metro:

Her anger was further fuelled when he tried to help their 3-year-old son use the toilet ‘without washing his own hands first’, she said, Jiji Press and other local media reported.

‘The toilet stinks so much that the child cannot even use it,’ Jiji reported her as saying.



clown portrait tattoo wife - 6343301376
By Unknown
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So, you got a tattoo of your main squeeze and things didn't work out. Turn her into the clown that she is. Classy.

He's not up for the challenge.
Via Gulf News
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Via Gulf News:

“The wife claims that her husband can only have sex with her three to four times a week… but she deems that unsatisfactory. After she and her countryman husband failed to reach an amicable settlement, the case was referred to the Sharia Court to look into the woman’s divorce claim,” sources close to the case told Gulf News.

When confronted by the presiding judge, the claimant [wife] said she desires to have sexual intercourse with her husband twice or thrice a day but he cannot fulfil her demands.