prison

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By Kevin
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From the submitter:

We were gonna have him jumped in on his 5th birthday but we had cake and a water balloon fight instead.
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If there's anything that discourages kids from a life of crime, it's an anthropomorphic penis (yes, penis - to a 6-year-old, "weiner" and "penis" are the same thing) with big googly eyes. That'd scare me away faster than the former convicts working the cash register.

~OLJ

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By Unknown
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To be fair, asking for a divorce "in the afterglow of intercourse" wouldn't make much sense.

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By Unknown
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Actually, I think you could just make things easier by integrating these lists (and the one that would be made under "Work") into a single list titled "Society." Welcome to the world.

~OLJ