On-Air Blooper

The stumbling, the slurring, the raised octave pitch at the end of each sentence, this is truly what it means to be White Girl Wasted.

ESPN's SportsCenter featured this cryptic line from Neil Everett, which started as a bunch of nonsense before drifting off into the resolute silence which comes from a Total Understanding of All Being. Maybe we just witnessed the moment a news anchor reached enlightenment live on the air?

But no, seriously, if you have any more of the good stuff please let us know Neil.

And here's the moment of impact, in delicious GIF form:

According to the Reddit thread where this video was posted, the drama is full of cautionary tales about people who need to change their path in life or face damnation - clearly what's going on in this video.

Assuming you believe damnation is getting bothered by awkward men in green suits.

That's the man himself, tripping over his own size 72 shoes (rough estimate) while walking away from the desk on TNT during the Clippers/Rockets game. Early reports indicate that Jack was able to secure the rest of his magic beans and run away from the falling giant of basketball. 

And here's some of the best of what the internet offered in response to the seismic event in sports coverage:

Fox 2 Detroit’s Amy Andrews had an interesting way of describing the weather on Wednesday morning.

The news anchor was chatting with Jay Towers and Alan Longstreet about the day’s forecast, with Andrews noting how fast the week was progressing as it was already “hump day.”

“Hopefully we’ll have a dry hump day,” she said.

And the reaction of her co-anchors was priceless.

They took to Twitter later to respond to her little slip of the tongue.