ocean

Via RNLI
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Massive shout out to the coast guard operator for maintaining a truly heroic level of calm. This paddle boarder was understandably shook from the moment the call started. However, as these coast guard operators are trained to do, nothing short of an unwavering sense of calm was delivered from the other end of the line. 

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They say not to approach seals at the beach, but when one comes up and wants to hang out, there's not a lot you can do to keep it away. This guy has somehow acquired the mystical animal magnetism of a Disney Princess, and we're jealous. That or he smells like food.

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The good news in this rather unnerving scenario is that the hammerhead shark actually wasn't trying to swoop in on the swimmer, but instead the fish/ray that was nearby. On top of that, the guy seems to be completely oblivious to the behemoth that was in his close proximity. Maybe it was that very calm that came through his obliviousness that kept him safe.

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The girl in the background is far too entertained by what appears to be quite the panic-inducing predicament. However, there were some other folks in the comments section that suggested this squid was injured, and that that's why it was hanging around the surface. Either way, the idea of falling off your surfboard and into the squid's home court is just a little bit unsettling. 

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Man Survives Getting Eaten By Whale, Answers Internet's Questions

A lobster diver by the name of Michael Packard from Massachusetts ended up enduring quite the historical experience. Specifically, Packard was consumed by a whale, and then lived to tell the tale. And with this being the era of everything being available online, we're actually fortunate enough to be able to read his account of what the whole experience was like. Pretty dang cool. 

Man survives getting eaten by a whale, and then proceeds to answer everyone's questions in a viral thread.
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Clearly this octopus is a good boi. He decided to go ahead and swim ashore to try and score some pets from some beachgoers. It's pretty cute watching the octopus accomplish his mission, and then swim back off into the sunset. 

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And there you have it: easily the most calming thing to have witnessed throughout the week thus far. Those eyes, man. 

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Those Sunfishes are something else, man. They look like they're literally not of this dimension. Or like some aliens just dropped them off on planet earth to see how they'd fare. Also, can we take a moment of appreciation for the awesome amount of chill that sunfishes have. 

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Creepy And Mysterious Things People Saw at Sea

The sea is just too big for people not to have complicated feelings about, especially when it comes to things like the still on-patrol submarines of the U.S. Navy. There are tales of hallucinations, weird natural events, and rare sightings among the many creepy things people saw at sea. Maybe it's the isolation. Maybe it's the constant bobbing and omnipresent exhaustion of anyone working at sea. Whatever it is, weird stuff happens out there.

creepy and mysterious stories from sailors at sea
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Tumblr Thread: Megalodon Horror Movie Should Be A Thing

Just in case you weren't already aware, Megalodons are an extinct species of shark that ranged between 15 and 18 metres. Basically, those underwater tanks were so massive and generally physically formidable that they'd have wreaked such havoc on blue whales that we'd end up seeing their population die off/get physically smaller for survival. Obviously, blue whales are huge. So, just the thought of that is a tad bit unsettling. Outside of what the Megalodons would do the ocean's modern day ecosystem, there does seem to be a lot of room for a creative take on some kind of Megalodon-inspired horror film. Hence, this Tumblr thread. 

A Tumblr thread on Megalodon's could've inspired Syfy channel's next big hit.
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Tsunamis are absolutely mortifying. There's something hard wired into our DNA that basically just trembles in fear whenever you see one in action. The sheer power of those tsunamis is at once humbling and traumatizing. We're just grateful that these guys were able to get out of that intense situation safely. 

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Tumblr Thread: Sea Urchins Wearing Mini Hats Is Everything

Thank you to the ever mystifying realm that is the Tumblr world. Did you wake up today thinking that you'd discover sea urchins have in fact been known to rock mini hats? No, no probably not. But here we are. That last bit at the end of the thread about how different sea urchins would try on the hats is a wonderfully wholesome little twist as well. 

A funny Tumblr thread about people outfitting their sea urchins in mini hats.
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Via OceanX
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So, apparently these Sixgill sharks can get up to 11-14 feet. Reports also indicate that they're generally harmless (unless they see camera flashes), like to chill out in the deep depths, and are known to hang out closer to the surface at nighttime. So basically, if you're a diver who likes to go for night dives in the Puget Sound, you might come across one of these behemoths. 

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Tumblr Thread On Baby Oarfish Escalates Quickly

So, maybe getting out of the ocean was a very bright idea after all. What starts as a seemingly innocent little Tumblr thread on the baby oarfish ends up escalating into a series of insights about just how monstrously big the oarfish can end up being. I honestly just wonder what Pokémon was inspired by this bad boy. If you're looking for another interesting read from the wonderful wandering minds of Tumblr, check out this thread about Hollywood's toxic beauty standards

An informative Tumblr thread on baby oarfish escalates very quickly. | mischief7manager digitalrabbit asked: Hey heard giving out anxiety, can have 1 anxiety please? biggest-gaudiest-patronuses answered: yes, here is baby oarfish
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Despite what some folks might think, it ain't all livin easy vibes out in the surfing world. Sometimes you encounter terribly toxic, territorial pieces of work like this dude who went off on a poor 16-year-old homie just trying to catch some waves out in Tamarin Bay

Via BBC
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One of the main pitfalls of whale watching is that there's no guarantee that you'll actually see a whale (or so we've heard from more cultured people who have time to go on boats). This whale seems to have heard that this crew needed some whale shots so it showed up right on cue.