observation

The internet is an ocean of information, permeated by the odd lobster of absurdity. People are thinking about dumb junk all the time, and they expel that junk as funny tweets and tumblr gems to quote later. There's never been a time with more free-floating observations. One might learn something, but probably not. At least funny tweets and tumblr gems grant strength against boredom.

We get it, most movies need a central conceit in order to make the plot actually work. No one is saying that every movie should end in five minutes with a phone call or the decision to "not stay at the creepy mansion." What gets frustrating is having to watch a bunch of movies that only work because the characters involved are unbelievably dumb. It's kind of like these unrealistic movie details that will never stop being annoying.

Tumblr is an island of misfit thoughts in the sea of confusing allegories, and it produces some real hilarious and totally random tumblr gems. Jumping from one absurd misunderstanding to another idiotic caption, it's hard to tell what stupid thought people will dogpile on next and roll into a tumblr gem to be unleashed from the depths.

We love a good old fashioned Twitter that manages to culture us a little bit on some of the strange things that occur over in a foreign land like the U.K. For instance, apparently British people call their fanciest private schools public schools, which kind of makes zero sense. But hey, to each their own. For some more worldly content check out this AskReddit thread about Americans' biggest culture shocks when visiting Europe. 

When you don't know the actual answer to a question, it can be a saving grace to be a smart ass about it. Or it could backfire and make people think you're a moron. Either way, here are clever and dumb jokes that are technically correct. They might not be even close to factually accurate, but hey, at least they're technically accurate.

We get that movies are all about getting as much plot and action across in as little time as possible, but that leads us to some interesting and totally unrealistic scenes that can make movies seem laughably unbelievable. We get it, they're movies, but dude, there's tons of stuff in movies that are just not like that in real life.

Learning is supposed to make you feel smart, but sometimes you hear something that makes so much sense that it just makes you feel like an idiot for not having known it. It's not wuite as bad as these obvious things people realized way too late. For something darker, here are random facts that we had no business knowing.

We get it. Filmmakers use unrealistic storytelling methods in order to convey the most amount of information to the viewer in as efficient a way as possible. It would be boring to watch Joe Pesci try to find parking for twenty minutes. That doesn't mean that some of these shortcuts go unnoticed, like how this tumblr thread uncovers the very limited types of movie posters.

We know that languages are all weird, and the one we use can be particularly confusing, but that can make it a more fun and nuanced thing to explore. We're all for seeing some creative uses and misuses of the English language. If you just wanna see people totally suck at English, then here are people who failed at using the English language.

They talk about "for better and for worse" but they don't really mention the 90% of the time in between where you just do things that are big enough to get on each others nerves but too small to make a deal about. Here are some relatable observations people in long term relationships will feel sum things up pretty well. For more, here are a ton of tweets about marriage that are too real.

The shower is the perfect place for your mind to wander down various rabbit holes. Something about it seems to lead people down strange avenues of thought. Often these thought exercises leave us with an interesting reflection on our own reality. Some may be profound. Most will be next to useless shower thoughts about how almost no one has ever made real eye contact with their own ass, or something.

If you were looking for a chance to get distracted by interesting thoughts and clever observations, you came to the right place. Here's a charcuterie of thoughts to let your brain-teeth sink into. Here are some more shower thoughts to blow your mind.

Shower thoughts: fascinating observations born of a few minutes of abstract thinking. Or if you'd prefer: stuff you can quote to your friends at parties to seem smarter and more insightful. Mindblowing? Sometimes. Thought provoking? Yes. If these don't satisfy your thirst for insight, then here's some more.