moments

If you can't think of something intelligent to say, just try to say something that sounds clever. And if you can't think of something clever, say something so mind-numbingly obvious, dumb, or weird that it seems like you're on a whole 'nother level. If you can't say something smart, at least be technically correct. At least that's what these clever and literal moments achieve.

Whether it's getting to see a movie with swears, doing some super risky crap and almost getting hurt, or general moments of sworn secrecy, there are moments when a father is inclined to say " don't tell your mother." Almost everyone has a moment they can remember their dad letting them do something their mom wouldn't approve of and being like "alright be cool." To keep it going with the dad theme, here are some tweets and memes to keep dads going.

Kids give people way too much proof that they're stupid and weird. They have completely irrational fears, make horrible choices and they're easily tricked. We know because we remember having irrational fears, making horrible choices and being tricked. They usually get better, but in the meantime here are moments that show kids are dumb and weird. 

Kids are some of the dumbest, strangest people on the planet. They have ridiculous beliefs, are easy to trick, and can't do anything for themselves. It's so bad that to call someone childish is an enormous insult. Sure, their brains aren't fully formed, but holy crap are kids stupid and weird.

When a relationship sours between the two wrong people, almost nothing can stop the tide of vengeful petty BS that they're capable of putting each other through. Even when it's not over a divorce, people can get amazingly petty for the sake of revenge. It's not surprise that lawyers get some interesting stories out of disputes between people.

We know that kids are weird and dumb. They believe the dumbest of lies, get strange ideas in their heads, and then get those very same heads stuck in chairs. We know just how weird and dumb kids are because we were kids and we were dumber than anyone.

Sometimes life will hit you in a way where you get launched into an out of body experience. Maybe you get a huge shock, or experience something so out of the ordinary that reality comes crashing down in an instant. Life will just throw those moments of chaos, failure and misfortune that make it unpredictable. 

If you had like a coworker who was a child, you'd never get anything done. We know that from our own experiences as children that kids are weird and dumb. Sure, they're still learning that life makes no damn sense, but that doesn't detract from the fact that kids are strange and stupid.

If you think your life is boring, then things are probably going okay. Unfortunate moments will add chaos to peoples lives. Whether it's something big like a train derailment or something small and frustrating like a falling tree smooshing your garbage bin, failure and chaos will definitely make life more interesting, but definitely not better.

Tumblr is a healthy mish-mash of wierd premises, snowballing half forgotten ideas and overly specific pop-culture lore. You're never exactly sure what you'll find around the corner. So open up that chest and have a good time dabbling in the funny gems of tumblr.

There's a lot of ways things can go wrong. Seriously, life has an almost unlimited supply of unfortunate times life got derailed by chaos. Engines start on fire, tanks of paint burst, pizzas get burned, and children cry. We're all just trying to get through the day, but sometimes the day has moments that give us grief.

Tumblr is a great big rabbit hole of creativity and moments of incredible strangeness. Many of these moments develop into awesome threads like Disney's mythical smut vault or this guy who found out he was allergic to citrus. Then there are these smaller, single image moments pf just enough context to bring smiles to our faces.

Let's cut to the chase, kids are dumbas hell. We see it in them, and we even see it in ourselves when we were younger. We all have a memory of some time we accidentally followed a stranger around the store thinking it was a parent, or used to think poop was stored in butt cheeks, etc. Anyway, children do stupid things, and it feels good to know you're an adult who has made somewhat of an improvement since your own childhood.

Big and small moments both have the capacity to make us feel bad. Sometimes something as small as dropping your spaghetti can have a worse impact on your general wellbeing than dropping a pallet of spaghetti sauce at work. Here are some times misfortune struck people's lives.

Put on your dad hat and prepare for some obvious and stupid puns. Some of our favorite jokes are the absolute most literal and dumb things that anyone could have possibly said. It makes us feel...smart I guess? They might be obvious, but they're technically not wrong. And we love to be technical, don't we? 

Yeah, they're right, kind of. This collection of ultra-literal puns and dad-level witticisms may be too dumb to handle. We think some are pretty clever in their own way? Probably? Anyway if you wanna see more cleverly dumb jokes then you can check out more of them right overhere.