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Funny Tweets to Give that Day a Boost

Twitter can be a war zone of horrible takes and unsubstantiated arguments about things no one really cares about, but it's also cut with sweet, delectable jokes. For more odds and ends, here are some more funny tweets that hit the spot and some random funny Tumblr nuggets.

Funny twitter jokes | leo dominguez @oledominguez COLGAT Almost left grocery store without buying bag spring mix throw, unopened, into garbage two weeks
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Stuck Dogs Who Require Assistance

Sometimes dogs get stuck and need a hand. There's no limit to the precarious and sometimes trivial situations dogs can find themselves stuck in, but we can't tell how embarrassed these dogs are, if at all. Some seem to be all too aware of their situations, while others seem to think it's just business as usual. For more dogs being dumb and weird, here are some dogs in awkward sleeping positions.

Funny dogs stuck in predicaments | silly dog with its head stuck in a tall cardboard box with only its snout sticking out | seal dog trapped in a blanket fabric shirt with its nose out looking like it has flippers instead of legs
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"Beware of Dog" Signs That Aren't Exactly Accurate

Your garden variety "Beware of Dog" sign brings to mind an almost cartoonishly ferocious hurricane of spit and teeth, and the animals behind these signs don't seem to fit the bill. Some of these you wouldn't be surprised to find sleeping in silly positions. For some dogs who have more of a sense of what's going on, here are professional good dogs who take their work seriously.

Inaccurate "Beware of Dog" signs and the silly animals with them | cute husky dog leaning his head between gate bars. cute dog sleeping on the ground in the sun.
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Tired Dogs in Awkward Sleeping Positions

They say let sleeping dogs lie, but that might lead to back problems. We've seen dogs do some amazing things, and being able to turn into tired goop on a couch is now one of those things. Some of the physics her makes no sense, but we're here for it. Dogs can get themselves in some precarious situations, like these stuck dogs that need a hand.

Dogs in awkward sleeping positions.
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Via Neo Ethan
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She really manages to pull off the whole "I live in a sewer and eat children" vibe. Not sure who among us can make their eyes go like that, but it seems hard.

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Peculiar Tics and Behaviors People Are Pretty Sure Only They Do

Just about everyone has some small act that they think only they perform. These acts might be born out of boredom, like making up songs about butts to sing to your dog. They might come from convenience, like using your extremely dextrous feet to pick stuff up. Or they might come from necessity, like tapping your fingers to the tune of "Sweet Child Of Mine" every time you see a picture of your Dad for some reason. Behaviors like these tend to make people think they're not normal, even though everyone does crap like this. Here's some stories of people realizing their roommates were actually crazy.

Peculiar things people think only they alone do.
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Stupid Design Screw-Ups of The Human Body

The human body is an amazing thing. It can heal itself, think really good, and it's one of the most persistent biological machines out there. Seriously, we run down our prey not with speed but with sheer willpower. That said, there are some definite design flaws in the human body that have caused a lot of us some major problems. The fact that one trip can send you to the hospital, or that choking is a thing. Anyway, here are some flaws people pointed out, as well as some possible improvements.

People share design flaws of the human body.
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Poor Dogs Who Had Run-Ins With Bees (12 Images)

One of the problems with being a dog is that you have to explore with your face. Sometimes when dogs root around they try to eat bees or get stung by them. Like people, dogs can have responses to bee venom that can be mild to severe, but with proper treatment they just swell up for a while and end up fine. Anyway, for more dogs who've gotten themselves into uncomfortable situations, here are some stuck dogs who need a hand.

Dogs who were stung by bees and have swollen faces.
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24 Bizarrely Hilarious Alternate Antiques Roadshow Captions

Writer @KeatonPatti has given birth to these bizarre and hilarious re-captions of items found on Antiques Roadshow. He's also the mind behind numerous fake Bot-written scripts like this hilarious Olive Garden Commercial. Anyway, here are some bonkers-ass antiques.

antique roadshow captions
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