Dad jokes just never get old.

Woops.

Because why should we be forced to hear our own thoughts.

It actually happens in real life.

Ya hope it's not real, but this kind of thing has happened to more people than they'd like to admit. Most gas nozzles have quick release mechanisms that snap off so idiots can drive off without killing everyone. But very few of them probably find themselves dying inside after accusing good Samaritans of following them for nefarious purposes. NPC vibes indeed.

Awkward if true.

Poor lad gets unmatched when he pretends to text like a bot.

What's so great about reality anyway? Sure, it's where we live, but enough of us have lived in crappy apartments and worse towns to know that real life sometimes doesn't cut it. Here are some Dungeons and Dragons memes to tide you over until your next session, which hopefully you can schedule within the next few weeks if Bryan can get his stupid life together and show up this time.

What would we do without Twitter? We'd probably read more books and spend more time with our families. But c'mon, who doesn't want to peer into the collective panic attack of a thousand media-addled minds? Books are way longer than 140 characters and we've destroyed our ability to focus. So here are some funny tweets to grind boredom into the dirt.

Sometimes life gets to a point when all you can really do is pour yourself into the world of fantasy. And in the case of Lord of The Rings, that world is so rich, terrific and well cast that “sometimes” becomes more and more like “all the times.” Now speak friend and enjoy these lord of the rings memes that shall definitely pass.

It's important to always be on your toes. You can never be too sure where the next one is coming from, and this little gem of an interaction drives the point home.

If only this bird knew that it's chosen distress signal sounds like an incoming call. Too bad it doesn't get that this sound is basically code for “I hope I get to ignore this.” Sure, it's incredible, but if this bird had heard some of the ringtones that were kicking around in the early 2000s, it would be singing 20 low quality seconds of Welcome to the Jungle for the low low price of twenty dollars.

Taste the quality.

Man that thing is huge!

Is there a better way to tell a former boss “you have no power here” than just laughing in their stupid face? Imagine thinking you have direct control over a person who's no longer an employee. They gave a meaningless threat just to watch their illusion of control crumble apart in their hands. For another absurd ex-manager, here's the ex-manager who tried to get an ex-employee to serve a Karen.

A silly chicken thread