Far worse than a cash bar

There's not much a deadbeat dad can do that'll make his children think less of him–except crawling out of the woodwork years after announcing he had a secret family only to ask them to share their college fund with his love child.

She's stunned

We get it... things got complicated when computers got small enough to put in our pocket, but just because you've lived longer on this earth, doesn't mean you're up to date on the nuances of everything that's going on in 2024.

Not that we don't LOVE listening to Cocomelon 24/7, buuuut...

$500 per day for life? That kid could have been going places...

BALDBALDBALD

Infertile? There are many ways to have a son or daughter that never involve pregnancy: you can adopt, you can foster, or you can steal your sister's baby before it's ever born...

Once the family got a little too comfortable in their host's home, things got stickier than the kid's table mac and cheese spilled on their opulent Berber rug