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Twitter Users Share Their Memorable Bad Dates

A date can be a little like a deal in a mob movie. Both parties are skeptical of the other, but are still mutually invested in the interaction going well. Often you choose a public place with exits, so just in case things go pear-shaped and someone brings their mom, you've got a way out. Here are some Tinder dates that went south real fast as well as some awkward first dates.

Twitter users bad date stories | Ignoble Savage @drayzze 9h Replying millercycle and @bartandsoul Went back her place after dinner and drinks, started making out, made our way bedroom only hear cough closet, where her husband hiding with video camera. 274 47 Kiss my Fat Ash @Tobi_Is_Fab 6h GIF 4
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Mom Goes Grocery Shopping, Doesn't Understand Scale

Words fall short. Sometimes, we enter into the world and through our series of attempts, a historical fail arises. In this case, it looks like mom got a bit confused when it came to figuring out how scales work. She was convinced that grams weren't being accounted for in that scale. Thankfully, she had someone close to her who was able to provide clarity for the situation. 

Mom goes grocery shopping, and ends up getting confused by a scale | Babes need 140 grams flour but grams isn't on here much do need? Xxxxxxx 10:59 Well currently have 500g flour outside numbers are grams babes XXXXXXXXXX 11:00 smiley face drawn in flour
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Painfully Relatable Awkward Moments

There seem to be those awkward moments that are just so damn common, but for some reason we can't get used to. We've tried to forget about those little moments like when you can't tell listening to you at a party, or that weird smile everyone does when you've already said hi. For some pristine awkwardness, here are some of people's weird first dates and awkward high school reunions.

Relatable awkward moments | aSadGirlsTongue 10.4k points 3 hours ago start tell story group but middle sentence realize no one is actually listening and ever so slowly get quiet and hope no one took notice.
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Funny Times People's Brains Went On Autopilot

Sometimes the brain clocks out for the day. Yes, these folks experienced some hilarious autopilot moments. You know, when you're in one environment, maybe at work, but some part of your brain thinks that you're elsewhere. Sometimes this comes about through sleep deprivation, while other times, it seems to be a totally random misfiring of neurons. Naturally, the resulting moments make for hilarious fails. 

People share their funniest experiences with their brains going on autopilot | axladrian 1y Put my bluetooth headphones freezer charge. Wanted go work with car, but forgot turn engine on stood there 10 minutes trying figure out neighbour even came help and didn't see problem.
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Embarrassing Times People's Devices Exposed Them

Everyone's phone contains something embarrassing from stupid google searches to saucy photos, to saucier photos, to straight up Ragu. Here are times people embarrassed themselves by letting their digital lives be seen by the wrong eyes. For some more embarrassment, here are awkward moments people had with their crushes.

Times people's phones and computers showed the wrong person an embarrassing thing | Piano9717 36.3k points 23 hours ago talking some cute girl going well, and gave her my phone add on Facebook. Her profile first profile on recent facebook searches
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Twitter Thread: Woman's Humiliating German Sauna Experience

A big thanks to Anbara Salam for the comedic relief during these troubling times. She provides an account of what was the most embarrassing moment of her life. It sounds like the original plan to enjoy a nice therapeutic sauna ended up giving way to being locked out in the cold, utterly naked. 

Woman gets locked out on fire escape after using sauna, and embarrassment ensues | Anbara Salam @anbara_salam As public service these stressful times l'd like offer, as palate cleanser most embarrassing moment my life. 10ish years ago, my ex bf and visited spa Germany s swimsuits pool but have be naked sauna. Btw speak no German. 1/ 9:52 16 Mar 20 Twitter Web App 2,031 Retweets 6,678 Likes Tweet reply
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Employee Gets Ant Revenge On Office Food Thief

There's nothing quite like the satisfaction of catching someone red handed, and deeply humiliating or inconveniencing them in the process. We've seen a guy get satisfying padlock revenge on gym thief as well as habanero cake revenge on food stealing roommates. This one, however, uses fear.

Employee catches and humiliates an office food thief by switching candy with chocolate covered ants | r/pettyrevenge Posted by u/BatricePergeron 13 hours ago Chocolate Covered Ants Insect- Fearing, Sweet-Thieving Officemate. My wife is lovely woman who not only gets up super early pack lunch work everyday, but also throws suprise treat every once and while all hear stories about people stealing their coworkers lunches out office fridge my case wasn't my lunch started getting stolen at work treat
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Guy Eats Six Egg Omelette Intended For Family, Embarrassment Ensues

This guy had quite the fail after wolfing down a wonderful six egg omelette, and then realizing that it was intended for the whole family. Yikes. There it is. The fail occurred, and some solid stress-induced indigestion likely resulted. 

Guy eats a six egg omelette that was intended for the family, and embarrassment ensues | TIFU by eating six egg omelet Years ago, on bright and sunny spring morning, my wife feeding our first child his highchair. My -laws, who were staying with us few weeks abroad, were preparing breakfast everyone. At time wasn't terribly unusual my mother--law prepare meals us, as she enjoyed helping us out with cooking and giving us more time tend our little one atypical my father--law had evidently decided
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People's Most Embarrassing Moments

Someone on AskReddit asked for people to get real with it and share their most embarrassing moments. These are just mortifying. It sucks when you realized you've messed up or said something undeniably dumb, and all there is to do is to own the fact that you've made a proper fool out of yourself. 

A collection of AskReddit replies to people's most embarrassing moments in life | HipsterGalt 22h like 5I shouted at my sister AN IDIOT -D-O-T 21 years later l've yet live down. Edit: Pretty sure this is my top comment now, tempted share screen shot with family and say finally worth something but, then they'd drag up things l've forgotten.
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Unfortunate Moments That Gave People Grief

We're all just trying to get through the day without having our everyday lives derailed by chaos. Thankfully for most of us, we do that. For a select few, unfortunate moments give people a bad time. It's sort of cathartic to see just how every little thing can go bad, and you can count your lucky stars that a day went by without some horrible crap happening.

Unfortunate events and moments.
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Employee Humiliates Himself By Talking Like Smeagol At New Job

This embarrassed employee shares a tale about a particularly embarrassing experience at a new job, where they were overheard by coworkers while reenacting the infamous Smeagol from Lord of the Rings. Kind of an awkward situation to get caught up in. 

An employee embarrasses himself by talking like Smeagol in front of his coworkers at his job.
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Times Guys Totally Missed Obvious Signals

Almost everyone has that moment when they're thinking about a time years ago someone asked them some obviously pointed question like "are you good at back rubs?" or "do you want to wash your pants at my house?" All you can really do is feel bad about not realizing it and move on. Here are some earth-shakingly obvious hints that guys missed. To be fair, sometimes "obvious hints" end up not being hints at all.

Obvious hints from women that guys missed.
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There's nothing funny about the horrible toll that the reality of climate change is currently taking on the planet. There is something somewhat goofy about people falling over themselves to wrangle a loose blood hose.

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Guy Accidentally Steals Ice Cream From Family, Twitter Users Share Their Embarrassing Moments

Twitter user @ItsAndyRyan, shared an embarrassing story about the time he accidentally stole an ice cream cone from a family gathering. Other people were ready to bond over the awkward and uncomfortable, by stepping forward to share embarrassing moments of their own. 

Guy accidentally steals ice cream from family, and other Twitter users share their embarrassing stories.
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Woman Accidentally Sends Mom Wrong Picture of Her Room, Handcuffs Included

Twitter user Ella Martine casually let everyone know of a small family text screw up wherein some handcuffs mysteriously made their way onto her bed frame. Sounds a little embarrassing. She claimed that it was for a video her roommate was shooting for school. Predictably, twitter had a real hard time buying that story.

A woman accidentally texted her mom a photo of her bed with sex handcuffs on it.
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It would be embarrassing if this happened in front of one or two people but this guy managed to get his hair blown clean off during a live performance like a goddamn cartoon. Farruko himself, who had previously denied his baldness, addressed the event on Instagram and was apparently a pretty good sport about it.