Chuck Wendig crafted a gem of a Twitter thread when he decided to "research" the origins of Doritos. Things certainly escalated quickly. Knew that crunch was too good to be true.
doritos
Author, Chuck Wendig's, wild and imaginative Twitter thread about the spooky origins of Doritos, and how they "bake souls" into their chips is clearly a silly reference to the recent Twitter thread about the electric origins of Triscuits. That being said, this is just the kind of absurd rabbit hole that is clearly a ton of nonsense, that we enjoy.
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Who says romance is dead?
At a Vancouver Canucks game, a woman proposed to her boyfriend with the key to any man's heart: A bouquet of Doritos.
How did you guys get engaged?
— Vancouver Canucks (@Canucks) March 17, 2017
Oh you know, #Canucks Puck Shuffle proposal! pic.twitter.com/3tR7I0mHCv
Did I say key to any man's heart? I meant, key to any man's heart attack.
People are cleaning tears and Doritos dust after this one.
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Via Mashable
Can you think of a more perfect gift for Valentine's Day than a bouquet of roses? Doritos did.
Not everyone can just go out and buy a bouquet of roses made out of flavored corn chips so they also included a way to make one yourself. It seems like it involves a lot of glue... 
via Doritos
Then, when you've charmed them with your perfect gift, it is customary to bring your Valentine to a fancy dinner. If you really want to outdo yourself this year, one KFC is doing a trial run of fancy table service for Valentines Day. According to Metro News, the Fishergate branch of KFC is the site where two lovebirds met and continue to have date night every week so far in their 50 year marriage. Pretty romantic. The date will include linen napkins and a soft drink sommelier to suggest the perfect soda pairing. 
via Metro News
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Via Food Beast
The pizza is only available in Australia for now. If and when this thing ever hits the states, prepare for all of our health insurance premiums to rise.
