Star Wars "Legends" content has always been pretty variable in quality, but we're not interested in the safe stuff like Thrawn or Mara Jade—we're talkin' Luke seducing multiple dead girls, Leia trying to delay puberty through dance, and Jedi masters named after, uh, self love. This is Canonball.
They say practice makes perfect, but why even go through the trouble of releasing more of these cake abominations into the world? It's like they tried to recreate everyone's favorite characters out of ear wax and wet newspaper. Instead of baking more, it might be best to find a big hole and bury them deep. For some more food abominations, here are cursed foods from lucifer's larder.
We may be a few years away from a complete robot takeover of the world, but now we know that when it happens, the descendants of these creepy-ass, bolt-sucking electricity munchers will be able to replace you and your family while making full and completely realistic eye contact. Go back to EPCOT you future-snatching wire-men.
The dude from Lilo and Stitch sticks around even though they've got a lot of issues, and he doesn't even have to break a curse or anything. Tumblr has a penchant for getting way too into Disney lore, like when they hyper analyzed Davey Jones in Pirates of The Caribbean.
According to this thread, Disney's strict policy that grants them exclusive ownership of any of their employees artwork also gives them the rights to any of the filth that those artists also end up creating as well. We hope Disney has a smut vault/porn cave, but it seems unlikely whether or not they would officially confirm the existence of such a thing. Tumblr has come through with some weird cartoon lore, like this dark thread on Garfield. Tumblr users also share some pretty incredible experiences, like this pizza deliverer who made a list of all the insane people she met.
Twitter users are in a state of utter outrage over the news that there's a "Home Alone" reboot in the works at Disney. Is nothing sacred? It would appear so in these dark and troubling times. Like seriously. Leave "Home Alone" and go mess with something else, guys. Anything else. Just not this timelessly entertaining classic.
Twitter User @80skillerqueen, went ahead and gifted the internet with a series of face swaps involving Disney protagonists and their antagonists. Our one bone to pick with this otherwise amazing series of face swaps is that Stitch was NOT an antagonist. Outside of that this is gold. And can we all appreciate just how amazing the Scar one is for a moment please?
Apparently, that loveably stupid character was supposed to get more screen time, but it just didn't pan out. Between marketing and production of the movie, the creators realized they'd have to make a change. Hey, I'm still happy with their work. Also God bless Alan Tudyk, aka Wash aka Pirate Steve. For somefunny and cool knowledge about the original Jurassic Park, check this out.
Sometimes an animator is left with a problem like "how do I make this character use chopsticks if their hand is a literal fingerless stump?" The pragmatic solutions they've found are goofy as hell, and the absurdness they bring are a hallmark of animation. And then the other half are like "oh yeah, that's kind of stupid."
If you grew up knowing anything about the Disney Channel then you're familiar with those short magic wand "I'm blank and you're watching the Disney Channel" animations. Turns out the perfect Mickey Mouse logo was HEAVILY edited in post. These are great.
Hey, adults are the ones who write all of these shows anyway so it just makes sense that they'd sneak something in for the parents. Some of these are references only adults would get, others are just straight up filthy. Anyway, after these you may look at your childhood a little differently.
