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Random Funny Tumblr Gems to Fill Those Pockets

Sometimes Tumblr has that blend of creativity and total weirdness that makes it just the right thing for just the right time. People could be working on names for edible flying machines or just coming up with the worst puns imaginable. These are some random Tumblr gems to tumble through.

Funny tumblr moments | pteapotdactyl weareallfromearth Follow getlitaesthetic Follow Today 10:12 want 6 pet sloths so can name them after every sin except sloth Today my wife texted this, and then immediately called make sure got because an urgent message Source
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Tumblr Post: Guy Makes Friends With Monster Under The Bed

Well well, this Tumblr story about a dude befriending the infamous monster under the bed is something special. Definite favorite moment is when the monster intervenes and plays the part of the hero in the guy's dire time of need. 

A Tumblr story about how a guy ends up befriending the monster underneath his bed | 2 writing-prompt-s drop small piece food on floor, and decide kick under oven/couch/ whatever because can't be bothered pick up. As walking away hear very quiet "Thank under bethanythemartian "No problem say words passing out my mouth on autopilot, before my brain engages and freeze.
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Quick Fun Tumblr Thread On An IT Wizard

This quick and fun Tumblr thread imagines a fantasy world where the IT guy is working magic to resolve people's technology problems. So many parallels with the real thing. 

Fun Tumblr thread imagines an IT wizard | otherwindow Consider fantasy series where court wizard is treated and portrayed just like an guy. Court Wizard, fixing Queen's magic mirror: has't thee attempted cleansing and reapplying runes anew?
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Brutal Insults That Don't Require Swear Words

Someone on AskReddit got a thread going about various brutal insults that don't require the use of any swear words. We already regularly feature collections of rare insults from spicy silver tongues that made a point of not leaning on profanity to get their verbal jab across. The fact that we now have a fresh collection of people going the extra mile to not insult someone with some commonly used swear words is just what we needed. 

People describe various brutal insults that don't require any profanity | GUNFIGHTERSONLY 21h should carry around potted plant replace oxygen waste. Reply 309
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The Hot, Spider-Filled Existential Dread of Tumblr's Australian Gothic

We've never lived in Australia, but if Tumblr's Australian rosetta stone is any indicator, it seems like an exciting place to be. Let this version of the place be a confusing warning of Australia-themed dread. That and the mortifying nopes of Australia drive home the whole "tons of spiders everywhere" thing.

Funny and creepy Australian Gothic tumblr thread | devilrie australian gothic all refer prime minister by their first name know them well, and they know us. all us there's man on street corner who never leaves just waiting mate he says realise he is on every corner every street are swooped by magpie same place, at same time, every single day s swooping season says neighbour has always been swooping season sometimes hear woman whispering late at night or early morning rage" she hisses rage prime
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Genius Solutions To Everyday Problems

Life only runs smoothly for so long before we encounter a nice curveball to throw us off our game. From there, it's up to us to not give into blind rage or panic, and instead troubleshoot that dang hiccup with calm and a little brainpower. These folks certainly implemented some clever solutions in the face of irritating problems. Check out some more life pro trips to get a leg up on life over here.

A collection of smart solutions to everyday problems that we encounter | making toast between two power chargers | lego figure used as a cable organizer
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Quick Tumblr Post On Caring For Monsters

Tumblr's always reliable for keeping all the bases covered. This time we get the rundown on the proper ways to go about caring for monsters. It is essential to provide that Sphinx with enrichment by answering its riddles. And who would've known that giant spiders are actually very social creatures, and should not be housed alone? For some more gold from Tumblr check out this professor's crazy beach tale.

A quick Tumblr post on common misconceptions when caring for monsters | headspace-hotel Follow Common misconceptions surrounding care monsters Contrary popular belief is NOT normal Cerberus's heads fight with one another; this indicates anxiety or lack proper enrichment. Giant spiders are actually very social creatures, and should not be housed alone. Provide Sphinx with enrichment by answering its riddles. Though Sphinxes can be trained attack those who answer incorrectly, they actually
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Twitter Thread: Man Writes Titanic Sequel For His Crush

Daniel Dockery's story about writing a Titanic sequel for his middle school crush might bring those memories of all the silly things you did for old flames, rushing to the forefront of your mind. When we're young and fearless the limits that we'll go to to impress those people that have caught our fancy, are seemingly boundless. 

Man shares story about writing Titanic sequel for his middle school crush | Daniel Dockery Follow @dandock middle school had crush on girl whose favorite movie Titanic. So impress her wrote an outline sequel called Titanic 2. And every like this tweet gets will reveal another awful detail this story.
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People's Jobs Described as Crimes

With just one or two small details left out, just about any job, even incredibly helpful ones like Librarian or EMT can be described in a criminal light. In a similar vain, here are bad stock photos of people's jobs getting roasted. That's not to say all jobs are super legit, there are definitely some sketchy secrets of various industries.

Askreddit where people describe their jobs as if they were crimes | decembertember 9.7k points 2 days ago drive fast and disregard rules road on my way break into peoples homes and cause immense water damage. Afterwards tear down their ceilings and drywall, and leave without cleaning anything up. Antwan_Valentino 3.4k points 2 days ago will never look at firefighters same
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Tumblr Thread on Titanic is as Fascinating as it is Made Up

It's weird how with a smidgen of detail and a few photos, you can convey some incredible and untrue "information" on eclipses and death cults. As with history, science can also be easily farced, like this thread on the "dangers" of black-tiled pools and gullibility. 

Funny and creative made up tumblr Titanic story | facts facts--just-made-up HAD TITANIC ARRIVED Titanic sank on April 14, 1912. Had not struck iceberg would have arrived New York on April 17th. But happening New York on April 17th, 1912 answer may change history as know .
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Most Creative Insults People Have Heard

Someone on AskReddit got a thread going about the most creative insults that people have ever encountered. We've always had an appreciation for rare insults that went the extra mile in terms of spicy banter. These creative insults are right up there with the best of the hilariously precise rare insults.

A collection of the most creative insults that people have ever heard | cheeseSamosas 22h gotta stop using head as just container teeth" Reply 1.8k
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Tumblr User Imagines Demonic Twist For Mercury Streamliners

First thing is first, and that is to be sure to note the username of the Tumblr user who hatched up this brilliant, entertaining, and absolutely ridiculous thread. The thread explores the fictional history behind why the Mercury Streamliners were put out of commission. This would make for a great movie. 

A funny Tumblr thread imagines the reason why New York Central's Mercury engines ceased operations | STAL One New York Central's Mercury" engines Chicago, 1936. dieselpunkflimflam Follow Where did these go, because desperately want them back. facts facts--just-made-up do NOT want them back. They look neat but there's reason these beasts were retired Mercury Streamliners, as they known, got off good start. They improved
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People Who Had Run-Ins With Aggressive Statues

With a gesture here and a flourish there, you can turn a statue of a famous baseball player into a bat wielding bronze demon ready to get revenge. For more creative people who took advantage of their surroundings, here are some funny textbook doodles.

People making statues jokingly hurt them | person throwing papers in the air near a statue of a baseball player swinging a bat | man pretending to get slapped in the face by a statue of a person on a monowheel
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Tumblr Thread: Angels And Demons Bond Over Sandwiches

Tumblr does it again with this treasure of a thread that imagines a world where demons and angels are befriending one another over stellar sandwiches. Additionally, the story suggests that angels and demons are often times estranged friends and family members. Now that sets the stage for a powerful drama to break out. Fortunately, the "drama" ends up being a silly, vaguely wholesome water gun/balloon fight. 

Check out some more Tumblr gold with this thread about how elves are flat earthers with scary eyes.

Angels and demons bond with each other over sandwiches in creative Tumblr story | writing-prompt-s While putting favorite condiment on sandwich accidentally make magical occult symbol and summon demon teawitch silently take two more slices bread out package and make another sandwich put on plate with handful potato chips and hand demon. He takes sandwich, smiles and vanishes puff demonic smoke next day get job promotion were after. There no contract. No words spoken owe nothing. But every now an
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Low Cost Cosplay Living Fantasies for Cheap

Lowcostcosplay is every low budget answer to the desire to dress up as your favorite characters for cheap. The graceful, inventive and low cost solutions to the problems of producing super saiyan hair and cat ears are a budget marvel to behold. Who knew you could create such masterpieces with rubber bands, extension cords and a foot.

funny cosplay done on a budget | person dressed in white throwing spaghetti on their face and falling into a corner resulting in the image of a haunted person in a horror movie | guy in soccer gear kicking a ball over a watermelon football anime
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Tumblr Thread Explains "Dangers" of Black-Tiled Pools and Gullibility

It starts out really making sense, then you're like all right this is getting extreme? Then upon closer inspection, possibly by employing your crackerjack critical thinking skills you read the username and you're like "oh." The creative minds of Tumblr never stop, leading to some totally random, funny and bizarre Tumblr nuggets.

Absurd made up dangers of black pool Tumblr thread | facs facts--just-made-up Fun fact about Vantablack- Because absorbs all light heats up very fast. If exposed direct sunlight takes all UV and heat and contains them, and can reach heats well over 212°F boiling point water. So if did coat pool material water would boil as soon as sun touched killing everyone swimming
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