"If caffeine makes me awake, more caffeine will make me the most awake. Right"

We don't like the idea of being “don't talk to me before I've had my coffee” people. Office-style coffee humor usually sucks. It's also depressing to admit that we need stimulants to have even a semblance of well-being on any given morning. So rather than a wink and a nod and a 20 dollar mug that has an inverse graph of happiness vs coffee drank or whatever, we'd just like to say: “this is not normal, we're sorry, and please don't talk to me until I've had my coffee." Now here are some work mem…

It's inhuman!

Huh. Alright then.

The customer is always something.

It can be life-threatening.

Get this person a raise.

Sometimes, it's too hard to laugh through the pain.

Ignorance can definitely be bliss.

Boatloads of sugar.

If you say so, man.

What were they thinking.

Let it be a lesson to the rest of us.

Quite the pickle.

It could use a squirt of blue milk.

It's some kind of monster.