Father

Father of the Year Candidate right here! Dad's gut instinct pulling through in the clutch like no other. This story was both victorious and absolutely terrifying. 

Imgur user and adept Photoshopper bonebowl was able to catch his young son doing some pretty impressive things for a young man his age. 

He says "Our son was born premature 9 weeks early weighing just under 3 lbs. I like to joke that he wasn't premature, he's just advanced.  So I took some pictures of him doing some manly grown-up things."

It's your special day. What could be nicer than having an ex blow up or a pirate walk in? Some people have a pretty bad problem with holding their peace.

4 year olds are brimming with creativity, wonder, and the ability to lie through their little teeth for personal gain.

So apparently if you don't keep an urn sealed well enough, the human remains inside turn into a formidable brick of your loved one. Luckily, we live in 2018 so you can go to the internet for answers. And especially luckily, people have more to offer than just a simple solution. They also have terrifically dark one-liners.

The jury isn't out on whether allergies exist. Most people understand that. Most.