vest

I do not envy how many scorned Ewoks that guy is going to have to fight after he stole the fur of their young to make this thing.

While reading the book, "How to be Even MORE Badass," it's good to carry along your tote bag that reads, I (heart) Puking Outside.

"Snuggles, SNUGGLES!...crap, has anyone seen my cat? Screw it, he'll find his own way home."

This creepy vest hugs you when you get a "like" on Facebook.

Even worse? It was created by a team of stupid smart people at MIT.

I mean, if your options are passing out from heat exhaustion during your Fourth of July barbecue and looking like a total goofball, I suppose I'll take the latter!

One easy payment? I'm in.