oh god why

Please let it be the latter!

Edward Cullen was a vampire, and I would soon be jumping off of the nearest bridge I could find after realizing this exists.

Sorry about that, I'm getting heavy "The Ring" vibes from this one. Get back to me in a week if you accidentally erased yourself from existence by seeing this. Thanks!

I mean, we've all been there. I'd much rather look like a cartoon caricature on most days anyway.

Someday, maybe the rest of the NBA will be as trendy and fashionable as you, Craig Sager. Until then, we always have the NHL's Don Cherry to tide us over.

Wall-E here is getting all kinds of feelings that he didn't know he could feel before.

Surprise, they're at a fast food restaurant!

"What, this IS how I smile!"

On the bottom here we have your standard-issue "stocky guy," and up top we have "out of shape dad." I have a feeling you'll be pleased with this hybrid model of beach bod!

Point is, I understand this makeup job about as much as I understand math.

I mean, clearly her hide is tanned and scorched like the best of them. Bring on the gasoline shortage!

Any idea which aisle has the eye drops? Cotton swabs? SOMETHING to clean out my brain?