lips

If she has a boyfriend, I really really hope he wears zebra-striped lip gloss. I would pay to see them make out. In a way that wouldn't make me seem creepy.

Betty Boop gone wrong... horribly wrong.

The dangers of exotic plants.

We've got to send ladies a memo about this "purple lips" thing. Normally that's the sign that you're at a Halloween party or are severely oxygen deprived. Spread the word!

I mean, assuming there aren't any extra eyes hanging around elsewhere.

And wax lips are never okay.

I mean, you need some sort of lip-decor to match your handbag, right?

I mean, we are in the age of plastics after all. I can't really tell anymore.

Where did you find that lip color? Just to die for.

I would make a joke, but those lips are a deadly camouflaged hunter and I don't want to take any chances.

That clinches it. I'm never going to East Asia. They're just too culturally advanced for me.