gold

As if the chumps making Ugg boots needed more coke-induced fashion decisions, now you can get your fur boots in disco ball-style!

Especially when you collide with roller-skaters. It always ends in tears.

And if those pants don't help him impress Farrah Fawcett, nothing will.

Why couldn't he be the king of sweaters, or overcoats?

It still wouldn't look this tacky!