television

(Mom and I watching "The First Wives' Club") Mom: You know, if your dad ever wanted to divorce me, I think I'd just murder him. Me: What, why? Mom: Because I'd rather be a widow than a first wife.

(This was a few years back while we were watching David Tennant on "Friday Night with Jonathan Ross") Dad: If he can speak English properly, why dosen't he always do it? Me: ... What? He is speaking proper English. Dad: No he's not, he's got an accent. You can't speak proper English with an accent.

(Watching show about El Chupacabra with my uncle.) Narrator: Last sightings were seen in Texas... Me: Texas, its always texas. Uncle: What? Me: Nasty creatures sucking the blood of farm animals. Uncle: Probably their governor.