My sister, offering whipped cream off of a sundae: Does anybody want this? Mom: You don't like whipped cream? Sister: No... Mom: There goes your sex life.
(After getting my tongue pierced) Dad: I can't believe you did this! You know girls only get a bolt through their tongue for one reason! Me (sarcastically): What are you talking about? What reason? Dad: Don't give me that, you know what I'm talking about. Me: No I don't...Tell me. Dad: Nevermind. I don't want to talk about this anymore...
